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Red Envelope Group of the Three Realms Chapter 293

293 Chat Group Members Are Asking For My Moonshine

[Damn! Damn! Damn! The Treasure of Kidney did wonders for my body! My waist did not get worn out, and my legs do not hurt anymore! I don’t even sweat after seven rounds of battles on the bed!]

[My wife used to burn joss stick to time me when we have sex! After taking the Treasure of Kidney, my wife uses a candle to time me now!]

[My Bro Bei is super reliable! More reliable than all those TV commercials!]

[Products from Bro Bei are really high in quality!]

[I want it too…I want it too…]

Just as Chen expected, the Treasure of Kidney received all kinds of good reviews when it hit the market. All three hundred thousand Chen’s fans were sharing it with their friends and families. Plus, Chen’s advertisement was really creative and profound. It went viral instantly. The number of his fans was increasing at an incredible speed. Soon, it will reach three hundred and thirty thousand fans. On the other hand, Zhang was thrilled as well.

The order of one hundred thousand bottles of Treasure of Kidney had sold out completely. Now, he has received another order of one hundred thousand bottles of Treasure of Kidney! The size of the factory limited the production line. The order will be multiplied by folds if the factory is bigger in size.

Zhang proposed expanding the factory. His goal was to make it possible for the Treasure of Kidney to be sold throughout the whole country! Asia! The whole world! However, Chen rejected Zhang’s proposal. After all, there was only one dragon dick. Unless Chen manages to get more dragon dick from NeZha, things won’t change.

Also, Chen was worried that the King of Dragon might come to earth to look for him, if he can’t win the fight against NeZha. By that time, earth might experience another great flood. It was a terrifying thought. Thus, Chen did not accept Zhang’s proposal. Besides that, the profit from selling the Treasure of kidney was already lucrative enough. After deducting the cost of electricity, water, workers’ wages, packaging and other miscellaneous costs, Chen would receive approximately ten million per month. The total annual profit would be one hundred and twenty million!

Chen was extremely excited after doing some simple calculations. All of a sudden, Chen’s cell phone vibrated.

Ding!

[You have received a message from Bull Demon King!]

“Eh? Why did this guy look for me out of the blue? I was planning to look for him, actually!” Chen raised his eyebrows and opened up the message.

Bull Demon King: God Chen, are you there? (Grinning)

Chen: I’m here. What’s up?

Bull Demon King: Yesterday, I went to Mount Huaguo to have a drink with my brother; Monkey King. He served me the Hundred Fruits Dragon Dick Moonshine that you brewed!

Chen: I see. How was the taste?

Bull Demon King: Freaking awesome! That taste! I have no words to describe it! One word; Super Duper Magnificent! (Thumbs up)

Chen: Bro, was your physical education teacher also your Mathematics teacher?

Bull Demon King: What is Mathematics? (Stunned)

Chen: Er…Nothing…Continue with what you want to say.

Bull Demon King: Not only does it taste good, it is beyond effective as well! I went to look for Silver Fox after that, and she achieved multiple orgasms with me on the bed! My Princess Iron Fan was really happy with my performance as well! (Evil smile)

Chen: *Cough* Bro, can you get straight to the point?

Bull Demon King: I wanted to say your moonshine had helped me gain back my long-lost confidence and dignity! So, I would like to ask for more Hundred Fruits Dragon Dick Moonshine from you? (Begging emoji)

Chen: *Cough!* There’s no free lunch in this world! Get something to trade with me if you want more of my moonshine!

Bull Demon King: God Chen, what do you need? I’m actually pretty poor… (Pity emoji)

Chen: I don’t need anything expensive. All I want is Heavenly Pet Food! I believe that what I ask for is within reason!

Bull Demon King! Of course! My Red Boy used to keep Spirit Beasts. Thus, I still have a lot of leftover Heavenly Pet Food with me. I can use one hundred packets of Heavenly Pet Food to exchange for a bucket full of your moonshine. What do you think?

Chen: Deal! Let me go and get the moonshine now.

Bull Demon King: Thank you so much! (Salivating)

Ding!

[Congratulations! You have managed to snatch a Red Envelope from the Bull Demon King! You have received a hundred packets of Heavenly Pet Food! It has been stored in your treasure chest!]

Chen smiled and departed to his island immediately. Two more deities looked for Chen right after he sent the moonshine to Bull Demon King. This was totally out of Chen’s expectation. These two deities were Shennong and Yanwang! Both of them were well-known food hunters! They are always on the journey of looking for yummy food!

A little flashback here, both them were the very first deities that had a taste of spicy sticks. After some simple conversation with them, Chen found out that both of them wanted his moonshine.

“Hehe! My brother; Money King is helping advertise my moonshine! It’s good to have a brother like that!”

First, Chen used a bucket full of his moonshine to exchange for one thousand bottles of Hundred Herbs Potion. His stash of Hundred Herbs Potion had almost been used up after giving a huge portion of it to Xiangyu. With his stash full of Hundred Herbs Potion again, Chen can use it whenever and wherever he wants to.

“Next, I need to deal with this Yangwang! This time, I want to make a big deal with him!” Chen thought.

Then, he rubbed his hands and opened the conversation box with Yanwang.

Chen: I’m so sorry to keep you waiting. I was dealing with some other business just now.

Yanwang: No problem at all! No problem at all! I’ll be pleased as long as God Chen can spare me some of your moonshine! I was dreaming of having a taste of your moonshine after Monkey King introduced it to me! (Salivating)

Chen: Okay! Straight to the point! I love it! Let me tell you what I want now! I want a thousand Unholy Spirit Pills! A five-stars skill that is purposely designed for spirits! Lastly, I want you to upgrade my Netherspirit Battlescouter!

Yanwang: God Chen! You are so greedy!

Chen: Don’t freak out first. In return, I will give you three buckets full of my homemade moonshine!

Yanwang: Sounds about right! I can get you one thousand Unholy Spirit Pills and the five-stars spirit skill that you want easily. But, it is really troublesome upgrading your Netherspirit Battlescouter.

Chen: I will drop one more bucket of moonshine for you!

Yanwang: Alright…What kind of function are you looking for?

Chen: I want my Netherspirit Battlescouter to not be affected by Pure Yang items!

Yanwang: Can’t be done! This function costs more than one bucket of your moonshine! After all, the Netherspirit Battlescouter is a Pure Ying item! It requires a lot to modify its attribute!

Chen: Can’t be done? Fine! I don’t want your other items as well! The deal is off now! (Shrugged) I will ask my Sifu to do it for me! It should be an easy job for him!

Yanwang: This…God Chen! Let’s talk about it!

Yanwang: God Chen! Are you still there?

Yanwang: Deal! Deal! Deal! I will help you to upgrade your Netherspirit Battlescouter!

Yanwang: God Chen! Come back please! I’m going to cry if I don’t get to taste the moonshine! I will add in one more function for you, other than the functions that you are asking for!

Chen: Deal! (Evil smile) 

Red Envelope Group of the Three Realms

Red Envelope Group of the Three Realms

Sānjiè hóngbāo qún, 三界红包群
Status: Ongoing Author: ,

In a world of shallow-minded, materialistic mortals, what would one from humble beginnings – whose face had been stomped on, spat on, oppressed for the longest while by the arrogant, pampered upper echelons of society – do, when a mysterious application pops up on a brand new phone that was meant to be the birthday gift of an ungrateful girlfriend? What if the application takes the form of a chatroom where its occupants, bearing the names of mythical, fictional beings, start giving out ‘Red Packets’, all the while spouting nonsense?

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