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Cultivation Chat Group Chapter 225

Chapter 225: The small monk: I’m going out to make some money for my hemorrhoids operation!

Chapter 225: The small monk: I’m going out to make some money for my hemorrhoids operation!

Translator: GodBrandy Editor: Kurisu

The white-haired Anthony slowly regained consciousness… he felt that he was in a rather turbulent place. He had felt the same when he had sat on the tractor a long, long time ago. That extremely uncomfortable feeling of being continuously shaken.

“Goddammit! Can’t you just let me sleep in peace?” Anthony slowly opened his eyes.

It was bright! Very bright actually! Super bright!

When he opened his eyes, he discovered that everything around was an expanse of brightness. Moreover, this white light seemed to come from all directions, with no dead angles. It was the same as those shadowless lamps used when performing surgeries. You couldn’t see a single shadow!

He had the feeling of being on a ship. But if it was a ship, why could he see clouds right next to it?

At this time, a warm voice echoed near his ear, “Child, you’re finally awake.”

Child? I’m in my forties and soon to be fifty years old—and you’re calling me ‘child’? Anthony’s corner of the mouth twitched. Then, he turned his head and tried to look at the owner of the warm voice.

When he saw the owner of the voice, he was scared shitless.

It was a completely white and flawless human figure that was emitting white light from every pore. On its back were three pairs of wings that were slowly flapping, making it look even more sacred and inviolable.

An… an angel? Anthony’s mouth was wide open.

Why am I seeing an angel?

Did I… die? No way. I couldn’t have died in such an unreasonable way!

“Excuse me, where am I?” Anthony asked with a sobbing voice. He wasn’t that old yet, and he had still a lot of experiments to do. He also had many dreams yet to realize. If possible, he didn’t want to die yet!

“Don’t worry, child. There is no need to be scared. We’re on Paradise.” The six-winged angel had a smiling face and a gentle voice that made one’s heart warm.

However, even that smiling face was unable to dispel Anthony’s despair.

Paradise… then, I’m really dead? his eyes rolled over, and he fainted again…

“Senior White Crane, stop scaring him like that! What would we do if he were to be frightened to death by you? Remember that we have to exchange him for Instructor Li Jr.” At this time, a man in black clothes quietly appeared on the angel’s side, a smile on his face.

“What nonsense are you babbling about? I didn’t try to scare him. Moreover, ‘Paradise’ is the name of the boat. I wasn’t lying.” The angel had a gentle voice as before. Soon after, its body flashed, and all the holy light that was filling the surrounding area stopped. Its true form was finally revealed.

It was a huge white crane with three wings on both sides. This was its real form. The angel from before was something it had used magic to change into.

It was very good transformation, almost identical to the angels in Western legends. It was unknown if it was due to its human form, but it had quite a bit of status amongst the Westerns.

This person was True Monarch White Crane, Yellow Mountain’s good friend.

Instructor Li Jr. was taken away by the FBI or a similar organization. With True Monarch White Crane’s help, it shouldn’t be too difficult to exchange him for Anthony.

Actually, True Monarch Yellow Mountain could have easily sent someone to seize back Instructor Li Jr. directly, but that would have caused further unnecessary trouble.

Alright, all the things mentioned above were only excuses!

The truth was that True Monarch White Crane once owned a big favor to Senior White, a kind of life-changing favor. Therefore, whenever Senior White needed help, White Crane was the first one to volunteer to help him.

However, there was also another problem. White Crane wasn’t willing to, or it would be better to say that it did not dare to, see Senior White face to face—it was said that after receiving that great favor from Venerable White, it stayed by his side and acted as his faithful servant for more than two months.

But one day, it f*cked up and proposed to Senior White.

There is no need to explain what happened next.

That was True Monarch White Crane’s most happy and most painful memory. But even up till now, it did not dare to see Venerable White.

However, it still wished to help him if possible, even if it was an insignificant matter. As long as it could help, it wanted to help.

Therefore, True Monarch Yellow Mountain left the duty to rescue Instructor Li Jr. to it with a clear conscience.

Instructor Li Jr. was now in the hands of the FBI or another American organization because of Senior White. Therefore, helping in taking him back was like helping Venerable White.

Not only would True Monarch White Crane do its utmost to complete the duty, but it would also owe a favor to True Monarch Yellow Mountain for allowing it to help Senior White!

Only a fool would refuse someone that would help you with a matter and also owe you a favor at the same time!

❄️❄️❄️

“Anyway, Senior White has come out of secluded meditation, right? Who is in charge of introducing him to the modern world this time?” True Monarch White Crane asked the man in black clothes.

This man in black clothes was True Monarch Yellow Mountain’s subordinate.

This man was known in the world of cultivators as ‘Heaven Shrouding Hook’ Zhou Li. His job was to deal with all the mess left behind by Doudou. True Monarch Yellow Mountain had an entire squad of people like him.

“Oh, Venerable White came out of secluded meditation quite some time ago. But, it seems that a rookie is in charge of taking care of him.” Heaven Shrouding Hook Zhou Li said.

“A rookie? Did those guys in the group become smarter and decided not to meet Senior White? A bunch of people with no control over their emotions!” True Monarch White Crane snorted in contempt.

“…” Zhou Li.

You’re the least qualified person to complain about the willpower of the people inside the group! At least, none of them went as far you did, proposing shamelessly to him!

“I bet that this new guy has already submitted to Senior White’s infinite charm, am I right?” True Monarch White Crane asked. It believed that no matter if it were a man or a woman, a human or a beast, all would be captivated by Senior White’s incredible charm!

Zhou Li thought a bit and replied, “How should I explain it… according to what I’ve heard from True Monarch Yellow Mountain’s mouth, this rookie was affected by Senior White’s charm, but they’re still normal friends.”

“What? They’re still normal friends? Is this rookie a man or a woman? A human or beast?” True Monarch White Crane quickly asked.

“A male, human.” Zhou Li replied.

“A male? Is that rookie gay? He was unexpectedly able to resist Senior White’s charm!” True Monarch White Crane said astonished.

“…” Zhou Li.

Senior White Crane, what kind of logic is that! It is exactly because Little Friend Shuhang’s sexual orientation is normal that he is able to resist Venerable White’s charm!

On the other hand, True Monarch White Crane couldn’t be considered gay either.

It belonged to a very special race that had inherited the bloodline of ancient divine beasts. Their race was born from eggs. When they were born, there was no distinction between sexes.

Only once they had found their true love and concluded a special engagement would their sex change in accordance to that of their beloved one.

Generally speaking, they were a classy race with little to no moral integrity. Before they were married, they wooed both boys and girls. You could say they had complete freedom to love.

“Tsk. It seems I’ll have to go and meet this rookie face-to-face once I’m done retrieving Li Jr.” True Monarch White Crane’s two wings stretched and arrived behind its head; it seemed it was deeply pondering something.

I must thoroughly teach this rookie and let him understand how incredible Senior White’s charm is.

In this world, no one is allowed not to love Senior White! Every creature that is not loving Senior White is a mistake!

I must personally educate this newbie with a distorted view of the world!

True Monarch White Crane’s both eyes were ablaze with flames.

❄️❄️❄️

On another side, Jiangnan area.

A little more than one hour before, Song Shuhang and Venerable White grabbed Doudou and waited in the space above the Jiangshui’s Civil Aviation Training Center for quite a long time. At last, that specialized (in cleaning up messes) personnel send by True Monarch Yellow Mountain made its appearance.

Song Shuhang left Anthony to these specialists and told them the place of the ‘helicopter crash’.

Then, all the matters of a pekingese flying an aircraft, the helicopter crash incident, and the matter of Instructor Li Jr. becoming an astronaut were left in the hands of these specialists.

After everything was settled, Song Shuhang, Senior White, and Doudou returned home together.

After returning home, Song Shuhang called, “Guoguo!”

It was rather embarrassing, he told the small monk to stay home and look after the house, but he and Senior White rushed into space. After all that going back and forth, they didn’t even prepare lunch for the small monk.

Little Guoguo shouldn’t have starved, right?

Song Shuhang called two times, but there was no response.

“Weird, there’s no response. Is he sleeping?” Song Shuhang asked confused.

Then, he searched throughout the entire building once, but there were no traces of the small monk.

“Where did that rascal run to?” Song Shuhang clenched his teeth.

“Shuhang, look at this.” At this time, Senior White pointed toward the dining table on the third floor. Above the table was a novel that Shuhang had rented from the library and had yet to return.

Song Shuhang moved closer and discovered there were two rows of big characters written on the cover.

First row: “Elder Brother Shuhang, I’m going out to make money. Don’t worry about me.”

Second row: “PS: Previously, I searched on the Internet for a bit and discovered that to have your hemorrhoids surgically removed, you need to pay between 3000 and 5000 RMB! If you stay in the hospital for a few days, it’s even more expensive! When I left the temple, I brought with me only 1032.60 RMB, and I still need quite a bit for the surgery. Therefore, I’m going out to make some money. I’ll be back soon, Elder Brother Shuhang!”

“AAAAAH!!!” Song Shuhang clenched his fists and said, “Bastard! You’re purposely trying to anger me, aren’t you?! I told you to behave and stay at home, but you actually ran away! Do my words count for nothing?! And that PS… PS your sister! Hemorrhoids or not, wait till I catch you. I’ll spank you till you shit all over the place!”

Doudou shrank his head in fear. It seemed that Song Shuhang was rather angry today?

Cultivation Chat Group

Cultivation Chat Group

CCG, Xiu Zhen Liao Tian Qun, 修真聊天群
Score 8.6
Status: Ongoing Type: Author: , Released: 2015 Native Language: Chinese
One day, Song Shuhang was suddenly added to a chat group with many seniors that suffered from chuuni disease. The people inside the group would call each other ‘Fellow Daoist’ and had all different kinds of titles: Palace Master, Cave Lord, True Monarch, Immortal Master, etc. And even the pet of the founder of the group that had run away from home was called ‘monster dog’. They would talk all day about pill refining, exploring ancient ruins, or share their experience on techniques. However, after lurking inside the group for a while, he discovered that not all was what it seemed…

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