Chapter 605 – According to My Will, I Choose to Die
Translated by: Hypersheep325
Edited by: Michyrr
Without discussing the Pope or his senior brother and only considering his teacher and the Divine Empress, who did Chen Changsheng trust in more? Not long ago, he would not have even needed to think about the answer, but now, after long and serious thought, he dejectedly discovered that he could not trust either of them.
He had never met the Divine Empress, only understood several facets of her through Mo Yu, Xu Yourong, and Prince Chen Liu. Of course, he had read far too many records concerning the Divine Empress. He knew how incomparably powerful, cruel, and emotionless this woman who possessed the greatest authority in the world was. Now that he thought about it, his teacher was also this sort of person. Perhaps as one cultivated to higher realms, one began to revere and care about fewer things, and thus began to treat the world with more and more indifference? After stepping into the Divine Domain, one could no longer be counted amongst mortals, so one naturally would not possess many emotions of mortals either.
“If it really is as you said, then the Divine Empress and the Pope no longer have any space to maneuver. Even in these two years, everyone has been deceiving others as well as themselves, but they always have reasons for deceiving themselves. The conflict between the Imperial Court and the Orthodoxy will swiftly intensify, and there’s even a chance that the capital will be thrown into chaos tomorrow.”
Chen Changsheng looked at Xu Yourong and said, “I’m not Wang Po, still able to bear the world on my shoulders after my family is bankrupted and killed, but if this world were to fall into disorder because of me, I would still feel a great deal of mental pressure. In addition, if I really am Crown Prince Zhaoming, I cannot imagine a single reason the Empress would let me go.”
“If you really are Crown Prince Zhaoming, then the Empress is your mother by birth.”
Xu Yourong saw his calm expression and knew that these words were not sufficient to convince him, or even enough to convince herself. A person like the Divine Empress was not easily constrained by so-called proper human relationships and familial love. Xu Yourong gazed out the window at the autumn trees and said, “I will plead to her on your behalf.”
“If the Empress truly wishes to kill me, whose plea would be of any use? And I think that she now knows everything.”
Chen Changsheng stood up and stood next to her by the window.
On the return journey from Mount Han, under Xu Yourong’s meticulous care, although his injuries did not improve, they momentarily did not worsen either. With the power of the Heavenly Phoenix true blood, he even temporarily regained some strength.
The starlight illuminated Xu Yourong’s sublimely beautiful face, making it seem even paler. “We still have to find a method to resolve this.”
“In truth, there is a very simple method.”
“What method?”
“No matter what sort of schemes Teacher has secretly devised, they presumably involve me in some way. This being the case, if I disappear, these matters will naturally disappear with me.”
The bubbles on the lake reflected the starlight, beautiful and yet illusory. In reality, the extremely thin walls of those bubbles were all made of water.
If there were no water, those bubbles would naturally not exist.
Xu Yourong faintly guessed at what he wished to do.
Disappearing in front of the eyes of people like the Divine Empress and Daoist Ji was an extremely challenging task.
There was only one situation in which both the Divine Empress and Daoist Ji would have no solution.
That was to truly depart this world.
The soul would return to the sea of stars, the flesh would transform to dust.
Death.
“After leaving Mount Han, I’ve always been thinking, perhaps I’ve always been a person that was not meant to be alive.
“If I am Crown Prince Zhaoming, according to the theory about what the Empress offered up to the starry sky to change her fate, I simply shouldn’t have been born. Perhaps it was just for that reason that when I was still in the womb, before I was even able to open my eyes, the sun wheel in my body was destroyed, and yet for some inexplicable reason, I didn’t die.
“A person that should have died long ago actually managed to live ten-plus years; this in itself goes against the Heavenly Dao and naturally throws the world into chaos.
“Although I’m late by ten-some years, if I were to die now, it could also be considered a sort of remedy, just like building a new wall for a sheep pen.
“If I were to die, these schemes would all be useless. These conflicts would seemingly lose all meaning. Only peace and tranquility would remain, not a bad result.”
Chen Changsheng stared into Xu Yourong’s eyes and very solemnly said.
He spoke slowly, doing his utmost to clearly enunciate each word to ensure that his intentions could be heard.
Xu Yourong had heard and was sure of his meaning. Her expression was still calm, but her voice seemed to sink somewhat and was even rather angry. “I will not let you die.”
“You understand. Even if you don’t want me to die, I will still die in the end. It’s just a matter of dying several dozen days earlier or several dozen days later.”
Chen Changsheng seriously explained to her.
In his long conversation with the Pope in the Li Palace, they had spoken of a story from one thousand years ago, of another continent countless li away, and of his illness, but not in detail, much less about how to cure it.
It was already obvious that the Pope also could not cure his illness.
He didn’t know if it was because he had been constantly pondering this matter since the age of ten, but now that the matter was truly right before his eyes, Chen Changsheng did not feel any fear.
Perhaps I’ve grown numb to it? he silently thought.
At this moment, he was very seriously pondering, since he was going to die, what he should do before he died and how he should die.
At most, it would only be a difference of several dozen days. To die early or late was not important; what was important was on what occasion he should die.
To die from his meridians drying up and his blood being exhausted, or by being eaten by those supreme experts? How he died was not important; what was important was that he was the one that had decided upon it.
He cultivated the Dao of following his heart. As he could not live as he desired, it was only right that he value the conclusion.
As he thought of these problems, his eyes grew brighter and brighter.
When she saw his eyes, Xu Yourong was sure of his intentions and her heart was tinged by a deep sorrow.
“I will not permit you to die,” she declared.
In Mount Han, on the journey, and just a moment ago, she would often say to Chen Changsheng, “I will not let you die.”
Now she said, “I will not permit you to die.”
It was only a couple of words, but they reflected wholly different meanings, represented utterly different emotions.
Normally, when girls said this sentence, their eyes would often be red and puffy, their voices choked with sobs.
But Xu Yourong was still very calm, even deliberately indifferent.
Yet even she did not perceive that when she made this declaration, her voice ever so slightly trembled.
It was the deepest despair.
……
……
In the entire continent, only five people knew that Chen Changsheng was going to die.
To the common masses of the capital, this was just a very ordinary early autumn day. They lived life as normal, working and eating, walking and wandering, drinking and chatting, going over to take part in the spectacle after seeing the carriage of some noble house crash into a stone lion, hearing some small bit of news and then enthusiastically announcing their positions.
On this normal autumn day, shocking news circulated throughout the capital, attracting the attention of the entire populace.
Many people had already known yesterday that the convoy from Holy Maiden Peak and the convoy from the Orthodoxy had arrived at the capital together, but only today in the early morning did they come to know that the Holy Maiden was not staying at the Li Palace, nor at the Imperial Palace, nor even returning to the Divine General of the East’s estate. Instead, she had gone directly to the Orthodox Academy.
Moreover, it was said that she had stayed at the Orthodox Academy for the entire night.
“The Holy Maiden definitely stayed in the Orthodox Academy for one night!”
A pawnshop owner stood in the door to his store, waving his arms and shouting, his expression extremely solemn and respectful like he was narrating a scripture of the Orthodoxy.
No person could quickly accept this sort of matter, especially the young men. Whether they were scholars or hard laborers, they stood around the shopkeeper’s door with very unsightly complexions.
