471 Madam Zhao Recovers Her Memory 3
He knew that Madam Zhao was going through a difficult time. He did not know if this was useful. He hoped that this could give Madam Zhao some strength.
The wait was difficult and torturous, but they were all very patient.
At this moment, Madam Zhao was already deep in her painful memories.
Recovering one’s memories was to experience the memories of the past bit by bit and re-experience the emotions of the past.
Her 17 years of memories were all condensed on this night.
Su Sanlang and the others were suffering, and so was Madam Zhao.
She remembered Su Xiaolu’s words and said them again and again in her heart. It didn’t matter how bitter her past memories were. Her future was blissful. She had four children and a husband who doted on her. Her eldest son was a High Scholar and was highly skilled in martial arts. Her second son was already the top scorer. Her daughter would marry the Crown Prince in three years, and her youngest daughter was a divine doctor.
Madam Zhao remembered these deeply. When she was in a daze, she saw her younger self.
This feeling was very strange. It was as if she was watching how she grew up from someone else’s perspective.
Qi Xinyue’s confession was right. She didn’t treat her well at all.
When she was younger, she liked her younger sister, Yan Zhenzhen, and her younger brother, Yan Zhiyuan. She was less than two years younger than Yan Zhenzhen. At that time, she did not know that her mother was dead, so she liked Yan Zhenzhen very much when she was born.
She would lie by the bed and look at Yan Zhenzhen quietly. She would let Yan Zhenzhen hold her hand.
Qi Xinyue would push her away and let the nanny take her away.
There were not many memories. When she was four years old, she wanted to play with Yan Zhenzhen, but Qi Xinyue did not allow it.
Yan Zhenzhen and Qi Xinyue ate and lived together. She was very envious. She actually wanted to live with her too.
But that was impossible.
Lonely, she asked the nanny beside her why her sister could stay with her mother but she couldn’t.
The nanny hugged her and said with a sigh, “Poor Young Lady, you’re not her biological daughter. Your biological mother passed away when she gave birth to you, and Second Miss is her biological daughter, so she will stay with Second Miss and not you.”
For a four-year-old child, she didn’t quite understand. She still couldn’t understand the joys and sorrows of people, but she understood that she and her sister did not have the same mother. Her mother was dead, and she would never see her mother again. She would never be loved by her mother like her sister.
So, she fell sick.
Looking at her past memories, Madam Zhao’s heart ached.
It was also from this moment on that she yearned for Qi Xinyue’s motherly love to be shared with her.
Hence, she gave Yan Zhenzhen what she liked very much. She gave half of the gifts she brought back from her grandfather’s house to Yan Zhenzhen. Qi Xinyue’s expression when she saw her became much better. She thought that this was motherly love.
When Yan Zhiyuan was born, Qi Xinyue had a difficult delivery.
Yan Zhenzhen was so frightened that she cried. She was the one who held back her tears and hugged Yan Zhenzhen to comfort her.
She was sad herself. She just didn’t cry out loud. Tears of sadness and worry kept falling. At the time, she wondered if her mother had suffered the same pain when she gave birth to her. That was why her mother hadn’t survived.
In the end, Qi Xinyue made it through and successfully gave birth to Yan Zhiyuan.
Yan Zhenzhen and she both went to look at Qi Xinyue. Qi Xinyue was very cold to her and asked her to leave. She said something very strange, “Cold-blooded little monster, I doted on you for nothing. Get out.”
Yan Zhenzhen didn’t understand and cried beside Qi Xinyue.
She didn’t understand either. She went over to comfort Yan Zhenzhen and told her sister not to cry, but Qi Xinyue pushed her away. Her cold gaze was like a knife that stabbed into her heart. The piercing pain made her extremely sad. She cried, but Qi Xinyue hated it even more.
At that time, she did not understand that this was hatred.
She only knew that from now on, she would not be able to see Yan Zhenzhen often, nor would she be able to see her father.
In the few times they met, Yan Zhenzhen would always forcefully occupy everything she liked.
She did not fight for it. If Yan Zhenzhen wanted it, she would give it to her. If she wanted to play with Yan Zhenzhen, it would be like going to someone else’s house and seeing others’ sisters.
However, after Yan Zhenzhen took the things, she would turn hostile. She said, “You’re not my biological sister. Who knows what you’re up to? If I trust you too much, what if you harm me?”
Every time she heard these words, she would be sad.
However, every time they went to the Qi family together, Yan Zhenzhen would be very intimate with her. Yan Zhenzhen was very lively and cheerful, and her laughter was as crisp as a bell. Wherever Yan Zhenzhen was, everyone’s eyes would be on her. Everyone in the Qi family said that she was a ball of happiness.
Actually, she also felt that it was true. Even if Yan Zhenzhen changed often, she still liked this sister very much.
As she grew up, Qi Xinyue became colder and colder.
She knew that if Qi Xinyue did not like it, she would not go to Qi Xinyue.
The nanny who took care of her said, “Young Lady is blessed. The good days are yet to come. Your maternal ancestor will definitely find a good marriage for you. Young Lady will definitely be treated well. At that time, all of Young Lady’s grievances will disappear.”
She remembered what the nanny said. At the age of thirteen, she was very happy.
Even though she was experiencing this memory again, Madam Zhao could empathize with her past self. She was happy and looking forward to it.
That year, her gentle grandmother often brought her to many banquets and she got to know Sun Yangxin.
Sun Yangxin was well read and both of them blushed.
When they met for the first time, the two of them did not say a word.
However, not long after she returned home, she received news from her maternal grandmother that she was getting engaged.
At that time, she was fourteen.
After settling the engagement, she began to write to Sun Yangxin.
Sun Yangxin often went out, and he liked to write letters to tell her what he had encountered.
And he hoped that she would reply like this.
Her life was very quiet. Her three meals a day did not change much. She only embroidered and played the zither. She rarely had the chance to leave the residence, let alone leave after the engagement.
In one letter after another, Sun Yangxin said, “There’s a stream in a small monastery in the south of the city. There are prawns and crabs inside. I’ll bring her there in the future.”
“There’s a theater on West Street. They sing very well. In the future, we can go to the theater together. We can also write our own scripts and let them rehearse into a big show.”
In these letters, the two of them gradually developed feelings for each other.
The day of their marriage was set to be after she turned seventeen, when she was about to turn eighteen.
At that time, they would send a letter every two days.
Sun Yangxin had written many poems for her. Each line did not look special, but it was an acrostic poem. When they were connected, the short words were filled with longing and anticipation.
She was shy and happy. Madam Zhao could empathize with her, but she also felt deep pain because she was not all Yan Mian. She was still Madam Zhao.
As the wedding date approached, Qi Xinyue brought her out to offer incense and pray for blessings.
