Feng Tianlan still had it in her mind that she would never be willy-nilly about a relationship. If she did not like him, it meant that she simply did not. She would not give the other person any hope, even if it meant that they would never deal with each other again or that she had to say harsh words to hurt the other party.
Xi Jin looked at her and changed the topic in a fluster. He said, “Lin’er wanted me to come and tell you that Shen Yunya tried to provoke her and gave her the idea to let you and Jiang Ying be alone. Lin’er wants to beat her at her own game. Whether it works or not, we have to deal her a heavy blow this time.”
Her words pierced his heart like a needle. Such a pain had sobered him up.
Feng Tianlan made an indistinct sound and frowned slightly. She said, “You just let Sister Lin make the arrangements. I will play it by ear.”
“Okay.”
Feng Tianlan looked at him and asked, “Did you find out the truth from the state preceptor?”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know until it was too late and I had already helped her so much,” Xi Jin apologized again.
Seeing how Xi Jin apologized and still seemed so guilty and lowly, Feng Tianlan felt very helpless and angry. She said, “This matter has nothing to do with you. Shen Yunya should be the one to apologize. It was her actions that caused the six of us to be separated. You did not do anything wrong. You have nothing to apologize for.”
Xi Jin raised his eyes to gaze directly at the angry Feng Tianlan.
“Big Brother Jin, can you treat me like a normal person and not think of me as someone special again?” Feng Tianlan looked at him imploringly and continued, saying, “I really don’t need you to be like this. It’s too difficult and makes me want to escape very much. Also, I think of Big Brother Jin as the ruler of the realm with the power of a sovereign king. You are Big Brother Jin, who can make people breathless with one look and who lets people worship in adoration.”
Xi Jin opened his mouth and could not help wanting to apologize again, but he finally swallowed back the words.
“Even if you like a person and care about them, you do not have to act so cowardly and uncertain. Instead, you have to be more sensible and carefully regard the entire matter as well as see that person.” Feng Tianlan looked at him with a cold and serious expression and said, “Furthermore, I really like Mobai a lot. Anyone else’s love would be a burden to me and make me want to escape. So, don’t have feelings for me.”
Xi Jin squeezed his eyes shut like he was making an effort to master his broken heart. He fixed his gaze on Feng Tianlan and saw at her patience. He lowered his eyes and finally nodded to say, “Okay.”
He only had to agree with her words.
Feng Tianlan looked at him, feeling very helpless inside. It was not to say that he did not have his own strong views. But he only acted this way in front of her. And in order to take revenge against Shen Yunya, he sacrificed himself, which made her feel awful.
With a grim face, Xi Jin left the Bailan Alliance and walked alone through the streets. He was somewhat in a daze looking at the people passing by and the peddlers hawking their wares. He glanced at a corner where a little boy bought some sugar-coated Chinese hawthorns on a stick for a little girl. She smiled a bright and very sweet smile, while the little boy just watched indulgently from the side.
Was his attitude towards Dai’er really wrong?
…
Jiang Ying came to the East Palace and saw Shen Yunya leaning back uncomfortably. Her hand caressed her belly with a look of weariness while her close aide waited on her from the side.
“Ya’er, this has been hard on you.” Jiang Ying looked at her, feeling sorry. Ya’er was forced to become Xi Jin’s common consort and also did not like the baby in her belly. But, for the time being, she could only carry the baby due to pressure. He felt even sorrier when he thought about it.
Shen Yunya smiled bitterly and looked at him with eyes full of tears as she said, “Brother Ying, why don’t we just let it be and not force things anymore? Since it has come to this, we should just accept the reality.”
