Chapter 525: So That’s That
Translator: EndlessFantasy Translation Editor: EndlessFantasy Translation
Hao Ren could barely respond to that. To be fair, no one could have prepared for their pet cat suddenly changing into a full grown human. Even for someone like Hao Ren who had seen his fair share, it was too much too soon. And Rollie the cat girl did not seem too happy when dinner was not served to her. She raised her voice. “Poop scooper! Food! Where’s my food?!”
Hao Ren pointed to himself. “What did you call me again?”
“Poop scooper!” The cat girl stared at Hao Ren before going on all fours near his leg to scratch his itch. “Alright, rub rub. Can you give me food now? I’ve been running around all day long. I’m hungry…”
Hao Ren jumped as Rollie rubbed against him. “You’re really Rollie?!”
“Nya?” the cat girl instinctively responded to the word like a flicked switch.
“How can you spea… No… How did you turn out like this?” Hao Ren stammered as he was unsure of what question to ask. “So. you went out last night to transform? Did you eat anything wrong?”
Rollie yawned lazily as she shook her head and insisted on the very one thing on her mind. “Food.”
“Eat! Eat! Eat! That’s all you know!” Veins popped all over Hao Ren’s forehead. As he recovered from his initial shock, he realized that even if the cat’s life was upended, deep in her bones was still that lazy dumb cat, who only cared about eating. “Lily, get her some food.”
Lily nodded in a daze before bringing Rollie’s food bowl over. As she passed it to Hao Ren, something popped up in her head. “So, is she still going eat cat food from now on?”
Hao Ren did not have a chance to reply before Rollie darted over to grab her bowl and stuf her face full. She even had the courtesy to thank Lily. “Thanks, big dumb cat.”
“Awooo? I’m not a cat…”
“It looks like in the cat’s eyes, there are only three types of living organisms: big, medium and small cats. It then brances out to whether the cat is dumber or slower than her.” Hao Ren rolled his eyes. “And you of all people have the cheek to ask that after eating dog food yourself. Why can’t she eat cat food? Her food is much more expensive than the cookies I eat for goodness sake!”
Rollie then looked up at Hao Ren again. “Poop scooper, water.”
Hao Ren finally decided his pride needed defending and he pointed at the cat as he stomped his feet. “First, change the bloody way you address me. I’m your master, god damn it!”
“Oh, poop scooping master, I want water.”
Hao Ren was dumfounded.
The master and the cat argued for a good part of the day without anyone emerging victorious. The others also tried to talk with Rollie, but they were promptly ignored as the cat was busy eating. She maintained the grace and elegance of a cat, which was to ignore everyone.
The only progress was, everyone now knew where Hao Ren stood in her eyes. That… Ah… yes, he was the poop scooper.
Hao Ren had a defeated look on his face as he squatted on the sofa (he probably picked that up from Lily). As he looked at the cat girl rolling about lazily on her cushion, pawing her face as well as rubbing her ears and tail, Hao Ren was conflicted. Sighing deeply, he said to himself, “I remember reading about cat girls in those stories being all cuddly and considerate, and loving their masters to bits. Why did I end up with such a character instead—”
Before he could even finish, Rollie suddenly leaped up and dashed up the staircase before running down again. She repeated that for a few times looking absolutely confused. Hao Ren looked even more defeated as he pulled Nangong Wuyue by her sleeves. “…Teach her how to use the toilet… and how to get used to wearing clothes…”
Vivian patted Hao Ren on the shoulder. “I’ve heard many tales and legends about cat girls, and frankly speaking, the one before you is rather weird. But logically speaking, she’s much more realistic compared to the stories. At the very least, she hates clothes like a typical cat.”
“The question is, how did she transform?” Hao Ren facepalmed. “Even the most supernatural of phenonemons have a reason. You can’t simply have a cat transform into a human just because the script demands it… Besides, our place isn’t some enchanted ground…”
“Strictly speaking, our place is indeed enchanted ground.” Vivian shrugged. “That couplet by the door is worth several heaven’s gates. But I don’t think Rollie’s transformation has anything to do with the Fengshui of this house.”
“But didn’t that cat start developing odd habits a few weeks back?” Y’zaks had been silent all this while and only interjected at this moment. “Since when did she like to watch TV? And did she ever read the papers with you before?”
Hao Ren was gobsmacked. “She read the papers?”
“Yes, the papers.” Y’zaks nodded. “There was a time when my newspapers went missing and I later saw Rollie lying down by the staircase reading them. She was definitely reading them and not tearing them apart as the papers were neatly stacked beside her. None of it was out of place. But I suppose she didn’t know how to read yet, as she was only looking at the pictures.”
Hao Ren’s jaw dropped for a good while as he slowly recalled Rollie’s recent unusual behavior. He did not know when it started exactly, but the cat started to watch television and learned how to operate the remote. She could even remember the number of the channel on the top right of the TV screen and hit the corresponding button for the channel. She would also lay by the table and listen in when everyone was eating, as though she took an interest in the topics discussed. Then, she started to read the papers, figure out how the doors and windows worked. Heck, she would even go into the kitchen, not to steal some biscuits, but to see how her food was being made…
There were actual early warning signs before this, but because Rollie was a weird cat to begin with, and had a habit of doing things out of the blue, no one at home paid any attention to it. With Hao Ren cracking his head to solve the issue with the First Born and the other worlds, he never connected the dots, until now.
Y’lisabet pulled out her precious screwdriver and circled around Rollie before sighing resignedly. “Ahhh… what a shame, she’d be a perfect specimen to study… but there’s nothing to unscrew…”
He did not know how the mind of that demon princess worked as well.
“Seems like the changes to Rollie only happened after the New Year.” Vivian demurred. “While she didn’t gain her human form then, it was clear that she was mutating… Let’s ask her later?”
“I suddenly have this feeling that it’ll be rather difficult to talk to my own cat.” Hao Ren sighed again. “Did you guys not see her reaction earlier? A bloody runt she is. Say… Why didn’t I feel that way before?”
“Perhaps it’s because of the communication barrier that the relationship between master and pet grows. It’s probably a mental thing that makes you think that you’re close,” Lily suggested with a rare glint of insight. “Many times, people are able to talk so jovially because they don’t understand that the other party is actually mocking them. Have you forgotten how the Kerbalians first conducted diplomacy?”
Hao Ren sighed again. He realized that what Lily said was true, but he still had to figure out a way to talk to his cat… Perhaps, fish jerky would work?
By then, Nangong Wuyue had pulled Rollie out from the toilet. The cat girl was walking awkwardly and she had the instinctive urge to go on all fours. However, Wuyue was dragging her along on her feet.
It appeared that walking straight was a difficult thing for her.
Wuyue had washed Rollie’s face and tidied her hair. The latter now actually looked the part of a pretty cat girl. Hao Ren noticed that her facial features were a combination of Lily, Vivian and Wuyue’s, while her eye contour resembled Becky’s. Hao Ren wondered if the cat girl had chosen the features of those she had seen on a daily basis for her looks: if she had a hand in manipulating her transformation.
“Come here.” Hao Ren patted the sofa’s armrest. That was Rollie’s favorite resting place, but he quickly realiaed that she was now too big. “Uh, forget about that. Look for somewhere comfortable.”
Rollie meowed and deftly leaped onto the sofa, rolling up into a ball. She started to play with her tail and ears again. Hao Ren pointed at her body and asked. “Do you know what happened to you?”
The cat girl looked down at her tummy, and wiggled her head. “I became a big cat.”
“Do you know how you became like this?”
“Nyooo.”
“Do you know when you became like this?”
“Nyooo.”
“Do you know who I am?”
“Poop scooper!”
“…Let’s skip that question. How do you feel now?”
Rollie rolled around on the sofa, her eyes still looking confused. She seemed perplexed with the changes to her body, and was probably unnerved by it. But, she nodded. “Nyothing… You all became small though.”
“That’s because you turned larger.” Hao Ren sighed again. “Forget about it. Looks like your intelligence has yet to fully form.You probably won’t be able to explain this at all.”