(William’s POV)
Alicia ordered the maids to send Theon and I into separate rooms to tend to our wounds. I was waiting inside a room when someone knocked on the door.
*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*
“S-Sir William.” I woman’s voice was heard by the door. “It is me, Tricia.”
“Come in.” I replied.
The door opened and Tricia came in while carrying a first aid box in her arms. She closed the door and took the seat next to me.
“You can leave it there.” I said. “I can put the medicine myself. Her majesty must be waiting for you.”
“O-Oh no, please let me do it.” Tricia said. “I asked her majesty to let me do it.” She blushed.
I can see how Tricia smiled and blushed. That was when I confirmed what Theon had said, Tricia really had feelings for me.
’What a fool have I become?’ I scolded myself.
I have seen how Tricia became shy and blush if I am near, but I have never thought any deeper about it. I have treated her kindlier and special than other women because we had something in common, and that is out love for Alicia. I never thought my special treatment will let her fall for me. I never had such intentions.
Tricia started to treat the cuts and bruises I got from my fight with Theon. I can feel the sting on my face while Tricia was applying the ointment.
“Can you please take off your shirt?” Tricia asked. “You must have some bruises in your body.” She blushed.
“No need. I can do that by myself later.” I replied. “You can just give me the ointment so that I can do it by myself later.”
“I-I can do it right now.” Tricia insisted. “You cannot reach at your back anyway.”
“No, I can do it. Just give it to me.” I replied.
I tried to get the ointment from Tricia’s hand, but she was resisting. She was persistent not to give it to me that she was pushed back on the couch and I was out of balance and landed on top of her.
“I-I am sorry.” I apologized immediately and took the ointment from her hand. I got up from her and put the ointment inside my pocket.
Tricia was bright red after the incident. She sat up and composed herself after feeling shy.
“Ahem, um Sir William…” Tricia trailed off. “There is something I want to tell you.”
“I also have something to tell you.” I replied. “Please go on first.”
I looked at her fidgeting in her seat. I have a rough idea what she is going to tell me.
“Well, um… Sir William…” Tricia said. “What I want to say is… well… it is that I… I am in love with you. I fell in love with you Sir William.” She said with a blush on her face.
I inwardly sighed. This just confirms what Theon was saying earlier.
“At first, I see you as someone who is above me and should be serving. But when we arrived here in Grandcrest, you have treated me as an equal.” Tricia said. “I was happy because you are the only acquaintance I had here in Grandcrest and we share the same feeling of love towards her majesty that I found a partner in you. My feelings blossomed until I cannot reject it anymore. I fell in love with your warm and kind heart. I am not hoping for you to answer my feelings right away, but I-I hope you think about it in the future. I know you still harbour feelings for her majesty, and I can wait even how long it takes.”
There was silence for a while between us that it made it awkward.
“H-How about you… what were you going to tell me?” Tricia asked. I took a deep breath and ready myself. Nothing I say will lessen the blow of a rejection and so what I can do is talk slowly.
“Tricia, I am sorry. I am afraid I cannot let you wait for me.” I replied as mellow as possible. “I cannot let you wait for me because I am afraid that even after your hair turns gray, my feelings will never change. I have already given my heart to Alicia, and I am afraid that I can never get it back from her, ever.”
Tricia looked at me with a surprised face. Tears started to fall from her eyes.
“I am so sorry Tricia. I have never tried to lead you on by being kind to you. My kindness was given because you were also a special person to Alicia.” I said while wiping her tears away. But tears still streamed down. “I suggest you find someone that will love you and you alone. You deserve to be loved and be happy. Create a happy family with that person. As for me, I will stay here by her majesty’s side, alone.”
I took my handkerchief out and wiped the streaming tears from Tricia’s eyes. I like to scold myself because I was still being a gentleman to a woman I just rejected, but I cannot help it. Tricia is someone I treated as family and my kindness hurt her.
Tricia cried and cried, and I tried my best to console her.
**
Alicia had called for Theon and I and asked about what happened.
“I will both give you your punishment after the coronation and festivities are over.” Alicia sighed. “You can go now Theon. William, please stay for a while.”
“Thank you, your majesty.” Theon bowed and left.
Alicia and I was left in her office. There was silence for a while until Alicia sighed loudly.
“I heard from my husband your decision.” Alicia said. “Are you really sure about staying here and becoming the captain of the royal knights?” She asked.
“You know very well that my decision is final, your majesty.” I replied.
Alicia sighed and sat down near me. She held my hands and I felt her warmth.
“Will, let us put the formalities aside and talk as friends.” Alicia said with a warm voice. Something I loved to hear. “Will, you know that you are my best friend and I want the best for you. You have a good life if you inherit your father’s title back in Alvannia. You can have a good life, find love and make a family of your own. Will, I want you to be happy as well.”
“I am happy, Alicia.” I ȧssured her. “If you push me to go back, then you are just going to take away my happiness.”
“Will…” Alicia looked at me with sad eyes.
“Alicia, nothing you will say will change my mind or heart. I have told you before and I am going to tell you again now, my heart is with you and I cannot take it back. It would kill me if I do.” I replied. “I will forever love you. And even if you cannot return that feelings, I would like to be of help to you and stay by your side. Please grant me my selfish request, at least let me love you from afar.” I kissed the back of her hand, a simple way to show my love and respect.
“Oh, Will.” Alicia sighed. “Whatever will I do to you.” She gave me a swift hug.
I can feel her warmth and her won love for me. It may not be the same love I feel for her, but it will do. I will never regret this decision of mine because I know that being here is where I should be. Alicia will be the only woman I will love for the rest of my life.
