“This was the biggest stain in my life which could not be washed away. I could not deny how many people in this world have looked at my bare body and seen the places that I wanted to hide the most. I didn’t know if the reason they liked me and called my name was because they thought of me without my clothes on, which put me in a very awkward and uncomfortable situation.”
“I didn’t know if they wanted to scold me as “cheap” when they were smiling at me. I didn’t know if they wanted to strip me of my clothes when they held my hand.”
“I thought I met my true love that year. He asked to get married in secret, and so I did as he asked because I knew that as an artist, marriage was a considerable loss to their popularity, or it could even turn into a disaster.”
“I married into the Lu family and I had a mother-in-law, Qin Xiaoyue. However, you should know what temper Qin Xiaoyue has. She despised me, and your grandfather also did the same. Of course, I didn’t like you either, especially your family.”
“Lu Qin said that he needed to become famous as soon as possible so that he could inherit everything from the Lu family. So I took out all my savings, I didn’t know how much, and helped him pave a grand road. I even played the most disdainful roles I used to hate. I deliberately and constantly disgraced myself. Sometimes I even had to criticize myself rather badly in order to find all kinds of topics to talk with him. Later, he became popular, and my reputation was ruined. The entertainment circle was a very cruel place.”
It may take years to grow, but maybe it takes only a moment to destroy everything you have built.
“I put him on the throne of the king of films with my popularity, my connections and everything I had.”
“The title of king was bestowed on him, while I was the invisible existence of the Lu family.”
“I did everything I could for him and Qin Xiaoyue, I treated you all as monkeys. I left a tremendous mess for the whole Lu family to deal with. I became a thoroughly stay-in woman, vulgar and very secretive.”
“And when he became famous, it was the beginning of my uselessness. I quarreled with him, made trouble with him, and even wanted to hold a press conference, but it was not always successful and I only knew it then.”
“I married a supercilious wolf disguised in human skin.”
“They locked me up and said I was crazy.”
“Then there was one day.” She paused and squeezed Lu Yi’s finger. Both her hands then grabbed hold of his large palm tightly, placing it near her heart.
“Several doctors began to take my blood once a week, four times a month, and maybe even five times occasionally.”
“And at that time, I was pregnant.”
She gently stroked her stomach. “I wanted this child, no matter whose child it was, it was still mine. She was my relative, my actual relative, and also my only relative.”
“I had nothing in my previous life, I had no mother, I lost Yi Ling and my husband, and in the end the only person left was my child.”
“So for the sake of this child, I wanted to live. No matter what happened, I wanted to continue living. I wanted to protect her.”
“It was just that…”
She looked up at Lu Yi, her eyes growing misty as teardrops started to stream down her face, “Do you know why Lu Qin left me and this child behind?”
Lu Yi did not know, but he suddenly felt his heart ache because she started laughing, yet it was such a painful cry. The pain in her eyes also carried the pain from her past.
Yan Huan sat upright and once again, stroked the red scar on Lu Yi’s face.
“Su Muran had the same blood group as us.”
Lu Yi gripped her finger, “She wanted your blood?”
“Well,” Yan Huan nodded, “To be exact, Lu Qin wanted my blood to fawn the people of the Su family. Su Muran suffered from very serious thalassemia and needed a lot of blood transfusion, and I became her “blood cow”. If this disease was to be treated, besides bone marrow transplantation, there was also…”
She gently stroked her abdomen, and Lu Yi guessed it correctly before she even spoke about it.
“I had been pregnant for six months, but they couldn’t wait any longer. They cut open my stomach and took the bloody child out. I didn’t even know what she looked like. She was taken away by Lu Qin, and I lost a lot of blood because of this.”
“Later…” She propped her forehead on Lu Yi’s neck. “It was you who saved me. According to you, she was a girl, Lu Qin threw her in the trash can and you buried her.”
She closed her eyes, and at that moment, she just shed tears. For the unfortunate child of her previous life, for the poor child abandoned by her parents, she fantasized that her daughter would have been very beautiful, with a big pair of eyes and skin like hers. But unfortunately, that child was gone before she even had the chance to enjoy this beautiful world.
Lu Yi placed his hand on her shoulder, then firmly grasped it.
“Do you want to listen more?” Yan Huan laughed a little, but that laugh was bitter. As she asked Lu Yi, his thoughts wandered to the things she was about to say next, and perhaps he could not bring himself to accept them. After all, no one could imagine that Lu Qin would be so distressed in order to get the Lu family. If he treated his wife and his daughter this way, then so what if he was his cousin?
“Do you feel like it?” Lu Yi in turn questioned her, whether she dared to continue. He held up Yan Huan’s face and thought if she was able to pour out all of her past and her misfortune, those were the beginning of her embarrassments and the past she could not mention. If she had the courage to voice it, would she?
Yan Huan gently traced his red lips, then hugged Lu Yi’s waist tightly and snuggled her left ear near to his chest.
“Later, I went back to the Lu family and they wanted to drive me away, but because of you I stayed. At that time, everyone disliked me and everyone was ashamed of me. Only you and your mother were kind to me. You didn’t dislike me even though I treated you badly. You would stealthily give me food and water to drink.”
“That day, I heard the voice of Lu Qin’s mother talking, they…” Yan Huan closed her eyes, then took a deep breath and inhaled the air into her lungs, which made her heart ache.
“They were going to kill you.”
Lu Yi wasn’t surprised. If things came to that point, then it was the doing of Lu Qin. Originally, he was the kind of ruthless person that won’t go soft-hearted when setting his heart on something, and in this case it was eliminating Lu Yi.
“And then what happened? Did he kill me?”
Lu Yi looked ahead calmly, and his voice projected calmness, because he was now aware of the situation so there wouldn’t be any unforeseen accidents.
“No.” Yan Huan shook her head.
