Chapter 538: A Teenager
Translator: Nyoi-Bo Studio Editor: Nyoi-Bo Studio
Zhang Zian ate lunch outside. It was late in the afternoon when he returned to the shop.
Wang Qian and Li Kun went back to school to prepare for exams. Lu Yiyun was asleep on her arm. Maybe she stayed up late last night to catch up on comics.
There were no customers, so Zhang Zian didn’t wake her, and went inside quietly.
“Quack! Why did you leave so early this morning? Why didn’t you tell me?” Richard flapped its wings and landed on his shoulder. “I haven’t seen you since I woke up.”
Zhang Zian left in a hurry this morning. Wang Qian and Li Kun were cleaning the inside room back then. He had no time to tell the elfins why he was leaving.
He didn’t hurry to explain. Instead, he thanked Galaxy, who was playing hide and seek. “Galaxy, thank you.”
Wendy and an American shorthair were running in opposite directions. Galaxy hesitated on which one to chase after first, and tilted its head towards Zhang Zian. “Meow? Why did you say thank you?”
“Without your hints, I couldn’t have caught the elfin.” Zhang Zian smiled. “Weren’t you giving me hints?”
Wendy appeared in the pet’s shower room and meowed. Galaxy chased after it instantly. “Meow”
Okay. I’ll take that as a yes then.
“Quack! Another elfin? You just love to remember the new and forget the old. You waste my time, my mind, and my money!” Richard complained loudly.
Old Time Tea turned off the TV and asked, “Zian, who’s the new elfin? Let’s meet it.”
Fina swung its tail and said in a lazy tone, “I guess we have a new member of our feline family. Congratulations.”
“I hope it’s female.” Snowy Lionet added. “It better not fight me for raw beef sirloin!”
Famous woke up and yawned. It shook its head to get rid of the sleepiness, then looked at Zhang Zian curiously.
“The new elfin is neither a cat nor dog.” Zhang Zian uttered.
“It’s a bird, then?” Richard interrupted him.
“It’s not a bird either, it’s a monkey.” Zhang Zian spoke, seeing that Lu Yiyun was still sleeping. He pointed at the empty space in front of him with his phone and pressed the “release” button.
Molecular Monkey sat on the floor, holding the crimson book in its arms. It glanced nervously around the shop as well as the other elfins.
“Quack? The monkey is wearing glasses? It looks educated. I bet it’s smarter than you.” Richard looked sideways at Zhang Zian, and landed in front of Molecular Monkey, keeping a safe distance. It spoke in a mischievous tone, “Come, little monkey, smile for me!”
Molecular Monkey raised the nameless book in front of him as a shield. Its two brown eyes were full of spirit, as if they could talk.
“Smile! You won’t get pregnant from smiling.” Richard always picked on the weak. At first, it worried that this Molecular Monkey might be wild. After all, Monkeys were birds’ enemies in the wilderness. Since the Molecular Monkey was young and appeared weak, Richard became bold and hopped closer.
Molecular Monkey squeaked and stepped back out of fear.
“Stop! Can’t you see it’s scared?” Zhang Zian brushed Richard aside with his hand. He bent down and spoke to Molecular Monkey gently, “Hello, my name is Zhang Zian. This is my pet shop. Could you please tell me your name?”
“This is my palace, I’m the princess!” Fina said with displeasure.
Molecular Monkey looked at Zhang Zian, then at Fina, seeming a bit confused.
“My name is Zhang Zian, what’s yours?” Zhang Zian pointed at it.
“Eeek!” Molecular Monkey scratched its head.
Old Time Tea drew a deep breath, and spoke with astonishment, “Zian, this monkey can’t talk?”
Zhang Zian noticed the same thing. Even Galaxy, the least talkative, was able to say “don’t touch me” when it first arrived at the pet shop. The monkey was obviously scared, but still couldn’t speak.
“Quack! A mute elfin? That’s weak! I take my words back. You’re smarter than it.” Richard flew to Zhang Zian’s shoulder. “But since it’s here, it should have a name, right? Otherwise it’ll be too inconvenient.”
The mischievous parrot finally said something meaningful. Zhang Zian also agreed that it should be given a name, so he asked for everybody’s opinion, “What name should we give it?”
“Quack! I go first because of my big d*ck!” Richard was expecting him to ask this, so it went first. “I have a good name, perfect for it!”
Zhang Zian stared at Richard with skepticism. “Is it another dirty name like Jeff Richardson or Richard Jefferson?”
“No, I’m serious.” Richard said, “How about Stephen Chow Chimp?”
“Aren’t you afraid that Stephen Chow’s fans will beat the crap out of you?” Zhang Zian asked.
Richard said, “Take it easy, idiot. Let me finish first. This has nothing to do with Stephen Chow himself, all right?”
“Then explain yourself. If you don’t make sense, I’ll beat the crap out of you on behalf of Stephen Chow’s fans.” Zhang Zian replied, crossing his arms.
“First of all, it’s a chimpanzee. So ‘Chimp’ is self-explanatory.” Richard started.
Zhang Zian interrupted it, “No! It’s not a chimpanzee, it’s a monkey.”
“Quack! What difference does it make? In my eyes, chimps, monkeys and humans are the same thing.” Richard rolled its eyes.
“Then, why is the family name ‘Chow’? Don’t tell me it’s a coincidence.” If Richard didn’t make sense, Zhang Zian would hang it for two hours.
Richard blinked its eyes, and spoke like a philosopher, “I think this monkey’s intelligence is primitive. It might come from Choukoutien, so the family name should be Chow.”
Zhang Zian frowned at Richard. “How dare you speak ill of Beijing residents. Apologize to the capital residents, now!”
“Quack!” Richard flew away after its joke, landed on a high shelf, and calmly groomed the feathers on its chest.
Zhang Zian searched for the feather duster, but couldn’t find it. He had to let Richard go for now.
Could the parrot be right? Could the Molecular Monkey have come from Choukoutien? No, how could it be?
Zhang Zian wondered in horror, If Molecular Monkey really came from Choukoutien, it would be horrifying. He’d have to call it “ancestor” out of respect.
Molecular Monkey couldn’t talk, but it appeared to have understood the conversation between Zhang Zian and Richard. It knew that Richard was only joking and wouldn’t really hurt it. It smiled innocently, appearing much more relaxed.
“Zian, it is indeed more convenient if it has a name. Didn’t you name Galaxy? Give this one a name, too.” Famous suggested.
Old Time Tea agreed with Famous, “Yes, Zian, you should name it.”
Zhang Zian smiled bitterly. He was the worst at naming things. Last time, he lost billions of brain cells before he finally found a satisfactory name for Galaxy. However, Galaxy could speak and express its opinions, and told Zhang Zian that it preferred significant names. The Molecular Monkey couldn’t talk. How could he give it a proper name?
Names were important. He didn’t want to be careless in naming the Molecular Monkey.
“What suggestions do you have? You, shut up!” Zhang Zian glanced around at the elfins, stopping at Richard, who was ready to make trouble.
“Meow! I think it should be called ‘Monkey in the Book’!” Snowy Lionet spoke.
Zhang Zian wasn’t satisfied. “Is this according to your general naming rules? It’s not a monkey in a book, and that doesn’t count as a name!”
Fina yawned, closed it eyes, and went back to sleep. It demonstrated its attitude with the action, it had no interest in such boring matters.
Old Time Tea thought for a moment, and smiled. “How about ‘Wukong’?”
“Ha! Now Old Time Tea is joking around? It didn’t jump out of a rock.” Zhang Zian spread his hands in disappointment. “At least this is a normal name.”
“Zian, where did you find it?” Famous asked.
“The library,” Zhang Zian replied, then told the story of what happened today.
“So its characteristics are ‘My life has an end, but books are endless’?” Famous asked.
“Yes.” Zhang Zian replied.
Famous thought some more, then proposed, “How about ‘Endless’?”
Endless.
This was a proper name. It sounded like a hero’s name in a Kung Fu novel, heroic and bada**.
“Eeek!”
Molecular Monkey shook its head violently.
“You don’t like this name?” Zhang Zian asked.
Molecular Monkey shook its head.
“Fine. Let me think again.”
All the efins, except Fina, had expressed their opinions. They couldn’t think of a proper name.
As Zhang Zian was thinking, Galaxy came close while chasing Wendy. “Meow! Zian, it has a name!”
He was stunned, trying to think of how the Molecular Monkey could already have a name.
Galaxy ran away before he could ask.
Right!
Zhang Zian suddenly realized something. He forgot that the Molecular Monkey did have a name, a name given by itself.
Then he smiled. “Let’s do this again. My name is Zhang Zian. Hello, Pi!”
“Eeek!”
Molecular Monkey scratched its head in excitement, and its eyes were glistening.
Zhang Zian knew he got it right. Its name was indeed Pi, teenager Pi.
