< — To the Capital — > (2)
‘Refreshing…’
Lucia felt as though she was trapped in a burning fire and couldn’t breather then a careful touch began to sweep over her body and little by little, she was able to breathe again.
Gradually, her consciousness returned and she slowly opened her eyes. She could see him but she couldn’t tell if it was a dream or reality.
“Vivian.”
He called her name, a sense of urgency in his voice.
“…Hugh.”
When she heard his voice, Lucia suddenly felt emotional. She stretched out her hand as though to grab him.
“Haa…”
Hugo gave a huge sigh of relief. He lifted the thin blanket to cover her then took her hand and pressed his lips to the back of her hand.
He gathered her hair, dampened with sweat, and brushed it then he wiped down her forehead with a towel. Seeing his eyes filled with worry, Lucia felt sick to her stomach. It wasn’t just because of the indigestion. It was the first time since her mother died that someone was taking care of her when she was sick and in difficulty.
Tears welled up in her eyes and began to fall. Hugo’s expression hardened at this sight.
“Is anyone there! Where is the doctor!”
Seeing as he’d forgotten about using the rope to call and was screaming, Lucia squeezed his hand.
‘It will be fine.’
For some reason, this thought crossed her mind. The thought that it would be fine even if they went to the Capital. It was a vague belief that this peace and happiness would not be broken.
“Hugh. If we go to the capital, will you be unfaithful?”
“…What?”
‘She must really be in a lot of pain,’ Hugo thought and at the same time, the realization that she didn’t trust him at all made him feel powerless. In her mind, he was still far from reliable.
“I will never do that.” (Hugo)
Lucia watched him quietly then gave a small laugh.
“Then it’s fine.”
‘I’ll trust you.’
Even if he got another woman, he wasn’t one to deceive and hide in secret while cheating. He would rather say it out squarely.
‘After all, he can’t lie well.’
Lucia had seen him get thrown off guard and looking embarrassed several times. When he gave orders to the servants, there was nothing stopping him from lying so she thought that lying was probably his weak spot.
‘But, in the Capital’s political struggle, lying is essential. Will he be okay?”
Hugo’s cold mask only broke down in front of Lucia. She was worrying about something that didn’t need worrying. Lucia seemed to have already forgotten the Hugo she saw in her dream and the Hugo from before their marriage.
‘What the heck does ‘then it’s fine’ mean? Fine? What’s fine?’
Hugo wanted to shake her and ask her what she was thinking about. Just then, Anna came in and while she exchanged questions and answers with Lucia about her symptoms, Hugo sorted out his complicated feelings.
Was she always so difficult? He really didn’t know. In the past, he used to think that once he gave women jewelry, everything would be solved. Until now, nothing had ever given him so much trouble.
“I will prescribe digestive medicine to calm your nausea. Once you take it and sleep well, you should be fine.”
While waiting for the medicine to be brought, Hugo continued to wipe off the sweat on her forehead. The high fever had still not reduced and her breathing was still uneven. Hugo couldn’t make a sick person talk for too long so he shoved his wandering thoughts away for the moment.
“Why are you so foolish? If you were sick, you should have called someone.”
“I thought it would be fine.”
“It could have been a disaster. You lost consciousness.”
“Is it dawn? What do we do? You have to leave early but you haven’t gotten much sleep.”
“That’s not the problem now.”
Hugo lowered his voice as much as possible and tried not to get angry at her. She had done nothing wrong to make him angry. It was merely his heart that felt sad.
“I hear you’re often sick.”
“I am?”
“The headaches.”
“Ah…that’s just a common thing.”
“Can’t it be cured completely?”
Lucic chuckled softly.
“When you say it like that, it sounds like a fatal illness. It’s not serious. It’s similar to someone who has frequent stomachaches. It can’t be helped.”
“Serious or not, I hate when you’re sick.”
“I’ll be careful not to fall sick.”
“That’s not what I mean….don’t hide it from me when you’re sick or in pain. As your husband, I deserve to know that much.”
“Okay, I won’t.”
The maid soon came in with the medicine. Hugo held her to his chest and fed her the medicine then helped her change into new set of dry clothing. Not long after taking the medicine, Lucia fell asleep. With that, it was assumed that the sudden turmoil of the night was over.
Before daybreak, Lucia’s temperature began to rise again. She threw everything up including the medicine and her temperature repeatedly rose up and down. Hugo stayed up all night trying to bring down her fever.
Hugo expressed his anger to Anna who was called for the second time.
“Didn’t you say it was indigestion? What is this! She can’t even keep the medicine down!”
If the northern nobles saw this, they would recall the rumor that the Duke of Taran turned into a flaming dragon when angry. Facing the Duke’s anger for the first time, Anna was so nervous that her fingers went numb. She realized that it was a blessing that only she and the Madam knew of her offering Sir Philip’s remedy without knowing the components. Anna instinctive felt that if the Duke knew, she would lose her head.
“I-I think Milady’s stomach is very upset. By any chance, has Milady been shocked or greatly surprised recently? If there are addition psychological factors, indigestion can worsen.”
Hugo frowned and sank into thought. Apart from hearing of the King’s death, there was nothing different from usual.
‘So, she was shocked because the King died?’
Since Hugo had no affection for his father, he overlooked the feelings normal people would have towards the death of their parent.
She frequently talked about her mother but never really mentioned her father so Hugo was even forgetting that the King was her father. Still, since they were flesh and blood, so perhaps there were some unspoken left over feelings.
He wasn’t being considerate when he passed on the news. Hugo felt angry at his lack of sensitivity.
***
Lucia threw up everything she ate and she could only take in barely tea for two whole days then on the third day, she was finally able to take some watered down food. She ate about half of the rice porridge before leaning back on the bed and closing her eyes.
‘I must have been too worried about going up to the capital.’
It was her first time have such a terrible case of indigestion. She felt a cool hand on her forehead and opened her eyes. He was by her side.
“…The fever seems to have gone down a little now.”
He pushed back his plans to go to the capital and had stuck beside her the whole time. Lucia felt sorry, thankful and worried that it might affect his work.
“I’m really okay now.”
Hugo frowned slightly. The words ‘I’m okay’ seemed sewn to her mouth. She was sick so he didn’t want to make her to feel uncomfortable. he took a deep breath and calmed himself.
“I heard you had a little porridge. Do you feel okay?”
“Yes, it seems to be digesting now. I don’t feel nauseous.”
“Are uncomfortable anywhere? You couldn’t eat well for a while, do you feel dizzy?”
“I won’t die if I don’t eat for a few days. My stomach was just a little upset.”
“It’s not only fatal illnesses that are illnesses.”
Even when she was sick, she didn’t desire anything. Even though she was sick enough to throw up everything she ate and her fever was high enough to scare him, she didn’t even say she was hurting.
Every time he saw her pale complexion, she would repeatedly ask him when he would be going up to the capital. And several times he wanted to reply with, ‘you’re really harsh’ but he swallowed those words down.
‘Do I really seem that unreliable?’
He felt anxious as he stayed by her side and watched over her.
“I think I have to go to the capital now.”
The urgency has now reached its limit. The Crown Prince had been sending letters but finally couldn’t contain himself and sent a messenger who arrived this morning. At least until the national funeral was over, Hugo had to be in the capital.
The fact that he had to leave while she was sick was very annoying but he couldn’t make the excuse that his wife was sick. To put in bluntly, she wasn’t terminally ill so he couldn’t.
“I’m fine. You have to go, don’t you?”
Seeing her weak but pure smile, his chest felt numb. His wife didn’t give him any trouble at all. But he hoped that she would trouble him. If she held onto him and told him not to go, he would chuck it all and stay by her side. His woman was lying sick in bed so who cared whether the king died.
“Get some rest. Don’t think about anything else. Take your medicine and don’t skip your meals.”
“Your nagging has increased.”
“If you don’t like it, don’t make me worry.”
Hugo bent down and kissed her head, forehead and dry lips.
“Vivian, are you really okay?”
Even though she reassured him several times but he remained for a long time, watching her with an anxious gaze then finally, he turned around to leave. As the door closed and the room became quiet, Lucia felt her sight grow blurry and blinked. Her tears fell onto the pillow. Maybe because she was sick, her emotional hold seemed to have weakened considerably.
She wanted to tell him not to go. She wanted to complain that she was sick and it was tough.
[Females sometimes fall apart when they lose the object of their affection.]
It was something Madam Michelle said some time ago. The Countess’ words weren’t wrong. If she relied on him without standing on her feet, she would completely collapse if he left.
To what extent was the proper distance Madam Michelle talked about? Lucia wished she could know the exact answer to that.
