There are three pains in love: wishing for it but not having it, not being able to give up, and not treasuring what you have.
In these three pains, Qin Zhi possessed two of these. Towards Lou Yaoyao, he wasn’t able to have her love, but was unable to give up.
Qin Zhi was a very targeted person who knew what he wanted and what he should do, but only towards Lou Yaoyao, he was helpless.
Because he really loved this stupid woman to death.
He used to think that he and Lou Yaoyao would not let each other off unless one side gave up first.
But the unexpected happened so suddenly.
When he received the text message saying “I’ll wait for you to come back –Yao Yao”, Lou Yaoyao might never know how shocked and pleasantly surprised he was. But, more of it was doubts. When he tidied up his emotions, a long time had already passed, and he hurriedly sent a text message to reply Lou Yaoyao. He was too anxious and just hurriedly sent an “Okay” word, and did not even add any punctuation mark. After he sent it, he regretted that the text message he sent back was too short. Will Lou Yaoyao misunderstand that he didn’t pay enough attention to it, but then he thought about it and laughed at himself in mockery, maybe she didn’t even take it seriously and only sent him a message in a spur of a moment.
He was such a fool that just a text message from Lou Yaoyao made him so excited that he couldn’t control himself.
Even though he knew being like this was like a fool, but he still foolishly lost sleep over it.
When he went back the next day, his mood became good uncontrollably, and he even made a joke with the secretary who he was always not very fond of. As long as he thought of Lou Yaoyao waiting for him, his heart was full of happiness and he couldn’t stop himself from smiling, he was probably too easily contented.
But soon, the illusory dream was broken. Lou Yaoyao didn’t wait for him, and even went out to play with Chen Hao knowing that he would return today.
The more expectations there were, the greater the pain. Even though he knew that it could have just been a spur of the moment for Lou Yaoyao and should not be treated for real, but he still took it seriously. The moment he realised the truth, he really felt very tired, his heart was tired.
When he received her phone call, he was a little reluctant to pick it up, but his body acted a step faster than his thoughts. On the phone, she was still arrogant and wilful, and the first thing she did was to shower blame on others. Yet, he didn’t dislike it at all. Really, even he didn’t think he could be saved.
He imagined that she would say many things and make any sort of demands, but never thought she would simply say “Qin Zhi, let’s go on a date tomorrow!”
It was such a simple sentence that made him panic and didn’t respond for a long time. He tried to reply to her in a joking tone: “Okay, of course I’m fine, but I’m just afraid you might stand me up.”
Wasn’t this his real thoughts.
She naturally said that she wouldn’t, and he gave a non-committal reply to that, and just hung up the phone quickly.
After being so confused, what mood was there left to hold a meeting. Without knowing it, he drove to Lou Yaoyao’s house. In the past two years, whenever he was in a bad mood, he liked to drive to her house and daydream for a while, but Lou Yao Yao never found out.
He couldn’t help thinking that she said to go on a date tomorrow, and what day was it tomorrow. Thanks to Yaoyao who had kept talking about it, even if he didn’t want to, he remembered that tomorrow was Chen Hao’s birthday.
Should he be feeling happy? The girl he loved had finally grown up and had learnt to use another man to make the man that she liked jealous.
Ruan Sinan once said that the reason why his relationship with Lou Yaoyao had come to this point was that he was too smart. If he was a little dumber, had lesser things to mind, and had started a reckless and enthusiastic pursuit like a hot-headed man in love, then he and Lou Yaoyao would definitely not had come to this point.
Although he knew that Ruan Sinan was right, Qin Zhi couldn’t do it, because he had no way to abandon all scruples. he couldn’t bring everything to the open and after that, only become strangers with Lou Yaoyao. He couldn’t let that happen.
He was too clear about Lou Yaoyao’s character. She always meant what she said, and her choices were black and white; accept or reject, she would only choose one, leaving no room for other options.
Alliephant’s corner:
I recommend reading from top again haha, which I went to do as I translated and read this. Its nice knowing two sides of the story, and qin zhi’s pov.
Alliephant
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