“So we can’t be in a relationship because of this diary? Come on… that’s preposterous. I won’t let some diary decide who I want to be in a relationship with.”
“Oh, believe me. Even you wouldn’t want to anger the shadow by breaking the rule.”
Rudy raised his brows and asked, “What was the rule again?”
“It forbids you to have intimate relationships with the ones you were acquainted with during your time travel.”
Rudy gulped down nervously and asked, “What if I already had an intimate relationship with someone I met during my time travel.”
“I am not sure. But you don’t have to worry about it since I know you would never do such a thing,” she smiled.
“Uhh…” Rudy chuckled nervously as his face slowly turned pale.
‘How am I supposed to tell her that I have been fucking Jessica and Lilim for quite a while now? But in my defense, I had no idea I would time travel or meet them in the past.’
Revealing his harem to a new harem member was always a nerve-wracking task for Rudy, but all that was nothing compared to how he felt before revealing everything to Rebecca.
He didn’t have the courage to do it. Or rather, he wasn’t mentally prepared after everything he had experience.
‘This is not a fairytale where everything would work out fine and everyone would get along.’
For Rudy, Rebecca’s words were absolute, and he treated her as his queen and goddess. So if Rebecca got angry and asked him to cancel his harem, he would be conflicted.
He couldn’t afford to anger or displease Rebecca, not even in his nightmares. On the other hand, he would never ever remove any member of his harem.
‘I will let the storm pass by and wait for the calm. Maybe the best time would be when mom meets Angelica. If she is in a good mood, there are chances that she wouldn’t mind my harem idea. But even if she minds it, I have to pull an ace card that would settle everything.’
Rudy had no choice but to trust and have faith in his plan, just like he had faith in his powers.
‘For now, I have to know what mother thinks of me. She already said she wanted to marry me, but she said that in the past tense. And she seemed to be scared of the shadow, so she followed the instructions.
If she does, there will be no future or hope for my relationship with her. I will ask her for her honest feelings and opinions— not what she thinks according to the diary.’
“Say… mom, what if that wasn’t written in the diary. Would you have had an intimate relationship with me?” he asked calmly, but with a curious look on his face.
“I can’t be certain with my answer. Yes, I wanted to marry you after you grew up. Yes, I loved you, and I loved you romantically. Yes, I wanted to have a family with you. But… as time passed… my love for you vanished. Or rather, my romantic love for you turned into a motherly love.
I stopped seeing you as my love interest and only saw you as my son. So my answer to your question would be a no.” She shook her head and said, “I wouldn’t have had or been having an intimate relationship with you.
Yes, I kissed you that day, and my emotions stirred up after that. But I decided to continue being your mother. Even now, I let my guard down and kissed you back when you kissed me.”
“…” Rudy was somewhat heartbroken by Rebecca’s answer, but he respected her decision.
If Rudy willed, he could order any girl to fall in love with him, but he knew that wasn’t real love. That was the only thing that felt real to Rudy in the world.
After seeing the despondent look on Rudy’s face, Rebecca bit her lips and uttered, “But if you want to have a romantic relationship with me, I am fine with it. I won’t reject your love for me.”
“But that’s not what you want, right?”
“It will take some time for my motherly love to turn into romantic love with it, so it’s not like I am against it,” she responded.
“But will you be happy when you are conflicted?”
“…”
Rudy smiled wryly and muttered, “You don’t have to force yourself, mom.”
“I am not forcing myself. It’s just… complicated. Think of it from my perspective. Imagine you were twelve years old, and you adopted a newborn girl. You raise her as your daughter; one day, when she turns adult, she says she wants to have an intimate relationship with you.”
“…”
“How would you feel?” she asked with a knowing look on her face. “I will be honest and say that even a twelve-year gap is not that big. Some celebrities marry girls almost half their age, and they are no different from normal humans.
But the difference here is that we raised one another. I am sure that when you were in the past and living with me, Jessica, and Lilim, you never thought of us that way, right?”
“Obviously. I saw you as my little sisters.”
“But you don’t see me as one anymore, right?”
“Because you are older than me. I can see you as an older sister, but… it’s hard to see you as my mother now. It feels… wrong…” he muttered.
“Isn’t it strange how a few terms can change a relationship drastically? But in the end, we are not related in any way, so we can have any type of relationship we want.”
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“Yes, so what type of relationship do you want to have with me, mom?” Rudy asked calmly.
“You can’t just throw this question at me…” she muttered with a flushed face. “You have to decide too.”
“I know.”
After a brief silence, Rebecca said, “I need some time to think about it. You should also put some thought into your decision. And we have to make sure that decision stays final and doesn’t change in the near future.”
“Great, now I have a pressure I never thought I would ever have.”
“The same goes for me.”
“Yes.”
Suddenly, Rudy turned to Rebecca and said, “Let’s start this phase after five minutes.”
“Why?”
Rudy pulled Rebecca and started kissing her slowly and passionately.
