Goodbye, mister.
When I opened my eyes…
It felt like I woke up from a very long old dream.
Something terrible and sad. It should be called a nightmare, but I didn’t want to call it that.
My eyes felt wet, probably because I cried during my sleep. The damp sensation made me realize that I was awake.
I was back, for real.
I didn’t remember what made me so sad, but the heavy feeling slowly subsided when I opened my eyes. Still, I felt fortunate that I could return with dad.
“Are you calm now?”
“Huh?”
I was exhausted and out of energy; I couldn’t even lift a single finger.
Elene touched my forehead.
“You don’t have a fever.”
I knew that too.
It was mild dehydration, my condition wasn’t perfect, but it wasn’t terrible either.
“Will you run for Your Majesty with this body?”
Elene clicked her tongue while asking.
Once I opened my eyes, the maids lost their minds seeing me run into Caitel’s room.
I wouldn’t do something like that again.
I was just curious if dad opened his eyes or not.
I wanted to confirm it with my own eyes!
That was all, but before I could even talk to dad, Serira caught me and dragged me back to my room.
… and the storm of nagging followed.
I was so scared of her nagging. If it weren’t for my weak body, she probably would have continued it till the evening.
Fortunately, that didn’t happen, and Serira sighed with an upset expression.
Once Serira left, Elene came to look after me.
“Look at your face! What did you do to that? T-this! I thought you would listen to us, really!”
“I just didn’t clean up.”
“Even then, what is this!? People are getting nervous because of you, princess!”
She was teasing me.
Elene brought in my meal, perhaps because I hadn’t eaten for a long time; it was soup.
Right, I knew that was what I had to eat.
Elene had served in the past, but it was unfamiliar because of the gap we had, so I kept looking at her. Rather than taking a sip of the soup, I looked at Elene instead.
“… but Elene, why are you still here?”
I knew that I shouldn’t be asking such things, but I wanted to understand her reason.
Why was the mother of a child in my room instead of looking after her child?
Although Elene’s children weren’t infants, they still needed their mother’s affections.
Elene sighed at my question; she touched my cheek before answering.
“I am here to look after the broken-hearted Miss Serira and the princess…”
Ah…
The spoon fell from my mouth. It was something I hadn’t thought of; my appetite disappeared right away.
Right.
It tasted bitter in an instant. It was unavoidable not to frown. I had been continuously thinking about my dad that I forgot to think about her. When I realized that, I felt a shudder in my body.
I was such a stupid girl.
“It’s good to worry about dad, but sometimes, please worry about your mom too, princess.”
She only said it to make me understand, but I felt depressed. Soon Elene spoke in her high, brightened voice.
“But you don’t have to worry. Serira will always be on the princess’ side. Right?!”
“Yes.”
“See, you can’t be depressed! Smile! Our princess has the prettiest smile.”
When I was young, she used to be a fool. When did such a woman turn so understanding?
While my growth halted, Elene grew up quickly.
The gap between us made me feel a little weird. Elene deliberately made funny expressions. I forced myself to smile at her attempts.
I didn’t feel better, but I felt comfortable.
“Right, how’s mom?”
“She is fine, of course. Her only daughter came back safely.”
Right.
For some reason, I felt terrible, but I didn’t want to do anything and worsen the situation.
When I looked at Elene, nursing me with a smile, I smiled unknowingly. Looking at her, I realized that sometimes it was nice when another person took the initiative.
When I was young, I thought of her as a noisy person.
I couldn’t help but smile at Elene. I began to admire her.
“Our princess looks similar to Miss Serira.”
“No, I don’t.”
What bullshit was she talking about?
I knew very well that we didn’t look alike; what was she saying?
Did she lose her eyes or what?
However, since I was young, she looked at me with the same eyes.
It was alright, but how could I be similar to mom!?
“Serira is too different from me.”
How could I compare myself with her?
When I refuted, Elene shook her head. It was a firm shake, and I was beginning to get persuaded.
“No. You are similar. A little kind, firm, and strict.”
Uh, yeah, that was right; Elene grinned while saying that.
What was she trying to do?
We didn’t resemble each other or anything, but what Elene said was true.
Right, would I discuss it with her? She was stuck with her theory that we resemble each other.
As I smiled, Elene stared at me. Her gaze was rude, but I didn’t want to say anything. Then, Elene laughed.
“Maybe the princess saw her and learned it? You always had Miss Serira around you.”
Well, that was true. Kids learn from observing their mom.
Of course, Ferdel and many other people were there, but Serira had an overwhelming influence on me.
Ah, except dad.
I didn’t grow up like my dad, but I learned how to be faithful from him.
“Kay, now that you are back, look after Miss Serira too. She doesn’t say it out loud, but she’s hurt.”
“Huh, okay.”
“Oh my, our princess is so nice. Cute!”
… if I don’t do it, then I would lose my humanity.
While the warm air spread around us, I sat back, looking at Elene pour cold water.
She wasn’t treating me like a kid.
Elene smiled while leaving the room.
Why did she have to get married?
Maybe the change in her was her husband’s influence; I started to appreciate marriage more now.
Well, as long as she is happy and well, I would be glad.
When Elene left, hunger came onto me.
Right, my meal.
I thought about the last time I had a meal and raised the spoon. I didn’t have the strength in my hands, but I wanted to eat.
When I was struggling to eat, a kind voice asked.
“Doesn’t fit your taste?”
Ah, scared me! My liver almost jumped.
Serira was standing silently and looked at me.
I was shocked.
Still, as I was shocked by Elene’s words, Serira sudden appearance made me go stiff.
“No, it is good.”
“Really?”
“Huh.”
It wasn’t tasteless or anything, but as mom asked, I wanted to say something nice.
Well, I hadn’t had a meal in a while, so anything would taste good. Honestly, I doubted if I could taste anything.
Did my taste buds deteriorate?
Still, the food was edible.
I was silently tapping my spoon, Serira stood there with a change of clothes.
Her familiar posture.
I took it for granted, but for some reason, she seemed new.
It was my mom who was caring for me while I was gone. When I thought about it, something popped into my mind.
“What is it?”
I looked at her without taking another bite. Serira leaned in, shocking me. The familiar scent and warm touch on my forehead.
“Mom, I am sorry.”
I was asking for her forgiveness properly.
I was so sorry and guilty that I couldn’t look into her eyes, but without shame, my apology flowed out of my lips.
I was a weak person, knowing that my mom will forgive me. I was weak, but I craved her forgiveness. Even when I got older, I would always stay as her child.
“I was selfish, right?”
Without answering, Serira patted my head.
I tried to hold my tears, which were about to flow again.
“But you know. I couldn’t really let my dad go. I knew that it was my way of doing things, but…”
“I know.”
Serira leaned in, looking into my eyes. Her hands around my hands were as soft as ever.
“I know, princess. The only thing which makes me angry… is that I wasn’t of help to you. It would have been nice if I could have been of some help, but in the end, the princess was alone.”
“Not true.”
Seeing Serira show a bitter smile, I shook my head. How could I have done such a reckless thing without the trust of my mom behind me?
Holding her hand, I shook my head.
“Mom raised me as a child who could do such a thing.”
If I didn’t have her, would my life have been as peaceful as it was?
I knew I said it, but that was the truth. I knew that the excellent relationship between Caitel and me was because of Serira’s efforts. I had never expressed it, but my mother was a person who connected both of us without choosing sides.
How could I express that gratitude in words? I couldn’t.
I held her warm hand.
A warm smile spread on her lips.
I only felt warmth reach me when I felt that.
With her calm and gentle embrace.
“I am back.”
As if shocked by my greeting…
Serira’s eyes popped. It was so cute that I laughed without realizing it.
My mom smiled.
A quiet answer followed.
As always.
“Welcome home.”
