Oh, I see.
I was jealous of that child even though I was not a little baby who never got a mother’s love. I finally saw what had been ambiguously appealed to me since Silvia’s gave birth to the twins.
Mother…
Of course, I was not complaining about my situation right now. However, I finally realized what I had been missing from Serira after seeing those two. I did think Serira tried her best to be a mother figure to me, but I already knew what it felt like to be loved by my own mother because of my former life… I wanted to see my mother, although she’s not here.
It was not like I had never experienced a mother’s love before… Perhaps, I was selfish.
“Princess.”
Assisi called me. I calmly organized the ripples of my mind and turned my head.
“Let’s go see Dad.”
Assisi couldn’t even ask me back out of the blue. I wanted to smooth out the middle of his forehead with my index finger, but I couldn’t because I was short. Damn it, a chicken instead of pheasants, I held Assisi’s legs and smiled.
“I feel like I haven’t seen daddy in a while.”
Since dad and I were close, we ran into each other from time to time besides eating and sleeping, but these days, I didn’t feel comfortable enough to ambulate, so I intentionally avoided him. Something was bothering me, indeed.
Assisi was amazed because he knew me so well.
“Are you all right?”
What was he asking? My feelings? What was in my mind? I couldn’t tell anymore.
However, the important thing was…
I would only become more desperate if I continued to desire something I couldn’t possibly have. Whether or not I missed my mother, there were plenty of people who loved me as much as any mother would. People who cared about me for who I was. People who loved me. So then, I shouldn’t ask for more.
“Assisi, you’ll make an excellent father someday.”
Assisi nodded upon hearing my words.
“Do you think so?”
“Yes, I do.”
I was being sincere, but Assisi’s expression has subtly changed. Then he held me in his arms and smiled. It was a smile that looked empty somewhere.
“What a pity.”
“Why?”
“There’s no chance I’ll ever be a father.”
Huh? Why not? I stared at him as if asking him what that meant, and Assisi smiled again.
“Shall we go inside now?”