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Cultivation Chat Group Chapter 818

Chapter 818 - Hello, Buddha. It's time for us to part ways~

Translator: GodBrandy  Editor: Kurisu

“Stupid Yellow Mountain, I’ll fight you until the bitter end! Come, let’s fight a deadly battle!” [I’m Mr. Yellow Mountain’s loyal dog] used the vocal message feature to shout.

In the next moment, Doudou quickly sent a small video in the group. He was well aware that the mean True Monarch Yellow Mountain would mute him immediately after he had said the words ‘let’s fight a deadly battle’. Therefore, he had to swiftly and coolly send this video!

As expected, as soon as Doudou sent the video, True Monarch Yellow Mountain muted him… however, the link Doudou had sent was already in the chat.

At this time, Doudou was very pleased with himself. Stupid Yellow Mountain, I’ve seen through your moves. This time, it’s my win!

In the Nine Provinces Number One Group, the members of the group saw the link to the video.

The title of the video was—[A marvelous song that can make you sing over and over again].

The preview of the video was a cool picture of True Monarch Yellow Mountain.

“Marvelous song?” Northern River’s Loose Cultivator was confused. However, he didn’t click the link to the video.

When she saw the video, Fairy Dongfang Snow said happily, “I know, I know! The content of this video is surely the ‘Song of the Stupid Yellow Mountain’. I’m sure of it!”

Sun Splitting Halberd Guo Da: “I don’t think that’s the case. Given Doudou’s disposition, he’s unlikely to use the same trick over and over again while ‘fighting to the death’ against Senior Yellow Mountain. This video has probably nothing to do with that song, and should be Doudou’s latest work.”

After Sun Splitting Halberd Guo Da had sent his message, the Nine Provinces Number One Group quieted down.

Of course, it wasn’t because True Monarch Yellow Mountain had used his mass muting technique. It happened because after hearing that the video was Doudou’s latest work, the members of the Nine Provinces Number One Group lost control of their hands and immediately clicked on the link, eager to enjoy this new work that Doudou had produced after the ‘Song of the Stupid Yellow Mountain’.

After the video started, the sound of the song spread out. But after hearing it, the members of the Nine Provinces Number One Group were somewhat disappointed.

“The fragrance of blooming flower baskets~ Hear this song of mine~”

Just like Fairy Dongfang Snow had guessed, the song was precisely the ‘Song of the Stupid Yellow Mountain’ and not Doudou’s new work.

Was that all? It wasn’t that amusing, then! We have heard the ‘Song of the Stupid Yellow Mountain’ already, and there is no point in hearing it again! Northern River’s Loose Cultivator thought to himself.

Most of the members of the Nine Provinces Number One Group shared Northern River’s Loose Cultivator’s thoughts.

“Eh? There is something amiss. After hearing the song, I feel as if my body was drained of all strength, becoming soft,” Fairy Dongfang Snow said through the vocal message feature.

“I feel like throwing up.” Young Master Phoenix Slayer said, likewise through a vocal message.

“We fell into a trap. This is Fellow Daoist Creation’s voice!” Snow Wolf Cave said.

“Come to the great Yellow Mountain~ It’s a beautiful place with beautiful sceneries~ There are crops everywhere~ with a stupid Yellow Mountain all over the place~”

“That’s indeed Dharma King Creation’s voice. My ears are about to go numb. But, this time, the lethal power of his voice is somewhat low. Aside from my strength getting drained and this feeling of nausea, I don’t feel anything else. I can easily survive this,” Young Master Phoenix Slayer said.

“Sending a message to let you know that I survived.” Northern River’s Loose Cultivator wrote.

“Proof that I survived as well.” Cave Lord Snow Wolf wrote.

Dongfang Snow: “Ahahaha, although I have been drained of all my strength, I have to admit that Fellow Daoist Creation sang the song pretty well. After hearing it, I discovered that the lyrics are continuously reverberating in my head. In particular, the ‘there are crops everywhere~ with a stupid Yellow Mountain all over the place~’ part is continually playing in my head. It’s very interesting!”

Fairy Dongfang Snow was that person that really liked the ‘Song of the Stupid Yellow Mountain’. She wasn’t someone that would seek death normally, but whenever the ‘Song of the Stupid Yellow Mountain’ was involved, her death seeking tendencies would reach new levels.

“F*ck, it’s really continuously reverberating in my mind,” Northern River’s Loose Cultivator said.

“Same here. My mind is now filled with the lyrics of the song,” Medicine Master weakly replied through the vocal message feature.

Thrice Reckless Mad Saber: “Senior Spirit Butterfly, are you online? Your disciple fell into the Secret Realm of Slowness and can’t come out. Help!”

Great Master Swallow Cloud: “Dammit, my head is also filled with the lyrics of the song. For how long will the song keep reverberating in my mind?”

Great Master Profound Principle: “[Emoji banging its head against a wall].”

Fairy Lychee: “Ahahaha, I was quick-witted enough not to click on the video. You guys were too naive.”

Dongfang Snow: “[Vocal Message].”

Fairy Lychee casually clicked on Fairy Dongfang Snow’s vocal message… in the next moment, Dharma King Creation’s loud voice was transmitted from her mobile phone. It was the last verse of the song, the ‘there are crops everywhere~ with a stupid Yellow Mountain all over the place~’ part.

Immediately after, Fairy Lychee also sank into that endless cycle, with the song continuously reverberating in her mind.

“…” Fairy Lychee.

Dongfang Snow: “Fellow Daoist Lychee, no need to thank me. I’m always happy to help others.”

As we said before, although Fairy Dongfang Snow didn’t seek death usually, her death seeking tendencies would go out of control whenever the ‘Song of the Stupid Yellow Mountain’ was involved.

Eternal Fire is very tired and wants to retire: “Did I get into the wrong group?@True Monarch Yellow Mountain, are you sure you added me to the right group? For some reason, I feel that this group is filled with Fellow Daoist Thrice Reckless’ second accounts.”

Yellow Mountain is very tired and wants to retire: “Ah~ there was no mistake. This group is precisely the Nine Provinces Number One Group you wanted to join. There is only this one group listed on my chat account.”

True Monarch Yellow Mountain had suddenly changed his nickname.

Eternal Fire is very tired and wants to retire: “…”

Tyrant Flood Dragon wants to father a football team: “Brother Eternal Fire, don’t worry. You’ll get used to it in a few days, and you will be able to blend in with the others just fine. I also felt that things weren’t right when I just got added, but I quickly got used to it.”

Eternal Fire is very tired and wants to retire: “…” I would rather go read the Four Books and Five Classics of my scholarly faction.

In this fashion, the message that Thrice Reckless Mad Saber had spent so much effort on disappeared within the rain of comments the members of the group unleashed after listening to Dharma King Creation’s song.

He had been unable to create a single ripple and was brutally ignored.

It was unknown when Thrice Reckless Mad Saber would be able to send another message.

In the Secret Realm of Slowness.

Thrice Reckless Mad Saber had tears streaming down his face. He gazed at the not too distant Liu Jianyi, who had a happy expression on his face, and faintly sighed.

It seemed that Liu Jianyi really loved this Secret Realm of Slowness.

He looked very happy in this place where even moving one’s hand or leg took a long while. There was simply no place more suitable than this for him.

This place where everything was super slow was like a paradise in his eyes.

He wanted to settle down and stay here forever.

❄️❄️❄️

In the meantime, in the Faraway Wandering Temple.

A small monk was looking at the sky, somewhat bored.

It had already been some time since he had returned to the Faraway Wandering Temple after leaving to treat his hemorrhoids.

After he had treated his hemorrhoids, the butt of the small monk Guoguo was fine and didn’t hurt anymore while he was sitting in meditation—he felt great. After the treatment, his efficiency while meditating and practicing had increased by a notch. At this time, the small monk had already opened another aperture, the Ear Aperture, and awakened a pretty good innate skill—the [Ears of Wisdom]. After awakening this innate skill, whenever Guoguo used his ears to listen to the text of cultivation techniques or other types of knowledge, he would be able to comprehend them at a faster pace.

As such, whenever the seniors in the temple were discussing profound concepts, he would be able to comprehend even more stuff and figure out things by analogy.

“So boring! Senior Brother Shuhang didn’t look for me as of late. I really want to go to his place and look for Doudou to play together with him,” the small monk muttered to himself as he gazing at the sky.

Should he look for an opportunity to quietly slip out of the temple?

He had heard that a bunch of guests had come to the Faraway Wandering Temple today. Perhaps he could blend into the crowd and sneak out alongside the visitors? However, he had no idea where these guests where… and if he wanted to blend into the group, he would first have to get familiar with them, right?

After pondering for a moment, the small monk joined his palms together, and said, “Buddha, please listen to the request of this disciple… make it so that Senior Brother Three Realms shows mercy, bringing me out to play.”

After saying this much, the small monk pondered for a while and joined his palms together again, saying, “Senior White, help the adorable little Guoguo this time! Give me a chance to leave the Faraway Wandering Temple! Senior Brother Doudou, while you are at it, you also give me the strength to run away from home!”

After he had said this much, the small monk opened his eyes and looked all around.

Now, it was time to see which one between Buddha or Senior White was more effective!

Would Senior Brother Three Realms suddenly lose his mind and bring him out of the temple to play? Or would he suddenly get a chance to leave the Faraway Wandering Temple?

Just as this thought flashed through his mind, Guoguo heard the voice of two young girls getting transmitted from a place not too far away.

Since he had already opened his Ear Aperture, he was able to hear their conversation very clearly.

One of the voices was rather immature, and the age of the person to whom the voice belonged should be the same as Guoguo’s. The other voice was a little deeper, and the person to whom it belonged seemed slightly older than Guoguo.

These were very likely the guests that had come over to visit the temple!

“Senior Sister, I heard our teacher mention that evil aura has recently arisen in the Jiangnan area and that evil spirits and other similar creatures might appear there. Do you want to go there to take a look? I’ve studied magical techniques for a very long time, but I’ve never got the chance to kill monsters and vanquish demons,” the girl with the puerile voice said.

“But we don’t know where this Jiangnan area is… in addition, we are in the Faraway Wandering Temple right now. It won’t be easy to elude our teacher and leave this place,” the slightly older girl replied.

“The Faraway Wandering Temple is very big, and we can just look for a senior brother and ask him to do us a favor and show us around the temple. Then, we’ll find an opportunity to sneak away!” the girl with the puerile voice said. “As for where the Jiangnan area is, it doesn’t matter. We can simply take a taxi to go there. I’ve heard a senior brother of the sect mention that if one arrives in an unfamiliar area and doesn’t know where the place they are looking for is, they can look for directions through their mobile phone or take a taxi.”

“In that case, should we look for a senior brother?” the slightly older girl said happily.

In a distant place… the small monk Guoguo had tears streaming down his face.

Wasn’t this his chance to run away from the temple?! In addition, he was even familiar with the Jiangnan area, and even knew that the university Senior Brother Song Shuhang attended was precisely Jiangnan’s university!

As for that place where this evil aura was spreading from, they wouldn’t have any trouble finding it as long as he could get in touch Senior Brother Song Shuhang.

As expected, Senior White was more reliable than Buddha.

Hello, Buddha. It’s time for us to part ways~ From today onwards, I’m changing religion!

The small monk rubbed his face, trying to hide his excitement.

Then, he tried to appear as calm as possible as he headed in the direction of the voice of the two young girls.

Jiangnan area, Senior Brother Song Shuhang, I’m coming!

Cultivation Chat Group

Cultivation Chat Group

CCG, Xiu Zhen Liao Tian Qun, 修真聊天群
Score 8.6
Status: Ongoing Type: Author: , Released: 2015 Native Language: Chinese
One day, Song Shuhang was suddenly added to a chat group with many seniors that suffered from chuuni disease. The people inside the group would call each other ‘Fellow Daoist’ and had all different kinds of titles: Palace Master, Cave Lord, True Monarch, Immortal Master, etc. And even the pet of the founder of the group that had run away from home was called ‘monster dog’. They would talk all day about pill refining, exploring ancient ruins, or share their experience on techniques. However, after lurking inside the group for a while, he discovered that not all was what it seemed…

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