We arrived at the foot of the tree.
“Fuck, that’s high,” Byung-hoon said. I’ve never heard him say such a thing until now. He’s been able to refrain from cursing up until now.
“He wants to know if you regret taking up the challenge,” the interpreter asked Byung-hoon, speaking on behalf of the chief. Byung-hoon took a deep breath and then turned to the interpreter.
“Tell him that this is nothing.”
“Got it.
The interpreter did just that. Looking impressed, the chief held up his middle finger again…but that middle finger. Is it really the village’s culture to express goodwill in that way? Or was he doing it on purpose to mock us?
Anyways, Byung-hoon looked up at the house and took another deep breath.
“Wow…”
It was high, especially when you looked up at it from directly beneath it. There was a crude ladder placed against the tree, but it didn’t look very strong nor safe.
“Seriously, don’t do it Byung-hoon. This isn’t safe,” the main producer said.
Byung-hoon shook his head.
“No, I can’t turn it down. Not after what the chief said earlier. I’m here to represent our nation of South Korea. If I give up now because I’m scared, the villagers will look down on all of the Koreans,” he replied, sounding more and more determined and proud with every following word.
“You’re thinking too much…they don’t even know where Korea is…”
“No, I’m going to do it.”
Once again, Byung-hoon stood his ground.
“Sigh…fine. But please, be careful.”
Then, he picked up a helmet that had a camera attached to it. He clearly planned for Byung-hoon to film his own demise. Byung-hoon seemed a bit put off by that, but he took the helmet.
“Are you sure about this?” I asked.
Byung-hoon shot me a brave smile.
“Don’t worry, Sian. I’m the chief of this clan. I’m here to represent the great nation of South Korea. I could climb this tree in my sleep.”
If he tried it in his sleep, he’d die for sure…
“Okay. Good luck,” I said. Then, I took a step back.
Byung-hoon stepped up to the tree and prepared to go up.
“Get the helmet camera ready,” the producer said.
The helmet camera began to move. Byung-hoon took the ladder and began to climb up. Right hand. Left foot. Right foot. Rung by rung, he climbed that latter.
You know, he has fatter butt cheeks than I thought.
When he reached about ten meters, Byung-hoon stopped to take a rest for a minute. He looked down to see how far he had come up, only to gulp.
“Whoo…”
With another deep breath, he continued to climb. We all watched, our worry increasing with every second. What should we do if he falls? The producer seemed especially worried, since he could take the blame if anything were to happen.
“Go, Byung-hoon!” Junho shouted. We all immediately did the same.
Byung-hoon kept climbing. When he reached twenty meters, he stopped again and looked down. The color drained from his face in an instant. He was clearly frightened, at least a little bit.
“Let’s go!” he cried out as he resumed his climb. And with that, he reached thirty meters. Then, he stopped again. At this point, his legs were trembling. He was definitely scared now. No matter how fearless you were, it’s terrifying to go all the way up there with no harness on. You have to force yourself to continue. Be brave and push aside your fears. Only then can you complete such a feat.
“I can do it!” he shouted. “I can do it!”
And he kept climbing until finally, he reached the house.
“Whooooo!” he exclaimed.
We all cheered for him from down below.
“Yaaay!”
The producer sounded especially happy. But wait, how was Byung-hoon going to get down? I think that might be scarier. Eh, they’ll think of something.
Suddenly, one of the Samaran men began to climb up the ladder, as if he’d been waiting for Byung-hoon’s signal. He’d clearly done this before, considering his speed was ten times faster than what Byung-hoon’s had been. He reached the top in one breath, causing Byung-hoon’s jaw to drop in utmost shock. The Samaran men all laughed, looking smug.
“Huh.”
I smirked as I stared at them. I decided right then and there that it was my turn. I’ll go and wipe those smiles off their faces. But there is one thing…if I go up there, then it will definitely cement my image as the freak-ish strong girl crush. I mean, I don’t care, but Jinwoo definitely will. He wants me to have a girlier image. Just a bit more feminine. That’s what he said. He wanted me to control myself, but still. I have to go up there. And so, I approached the tree.
“Hey, Sian, where are you going?” Hye-jeong asked.
“I’m going up there.”
“What?”
Did I stutter? I guess she never expected me to even think about climbing the tree. The staff weren’t even watching me. So, I immediately grabbed the ladder and stepped on the first rung.
Tap tap tap.
The sound brought everyone’s attention towards me, but no one seemed to care that much. They probably thought that I would come down immediately. They clearly thought I wouldn’t make it to the top.
“Looks like you want to try it out too, huh Sian?” Sung-hwan asked with an amused smile.
I kept climbing. When I reached about ten meters, everyone’s expression changed to concern.
“Hey, Sian!” he main producer shouted at me.
I looked down. It was pretty high up. This was fun.
“Yeah?”
“Come down! It’s dangerous!” the producer shouted.
I dismissed him with a wink and kept climbing. All of a sudden, everyone was shouting.
“Sian! Get down here!” Hye-jeong shouted. I gave her a wave and made it to fifteen meters. Then twenty. Twenty-five. The helmet camera continued to film me from above and I did my best to look like I was struggling. If I went up too easily, then it wouldn’t do any good for me. I did my best to look scared and determined as I slowly climbed up the latter, rung by rung. There was no doubt the viewers would eat it up. Soon I reached thirty, then thirty-five. All of a sudden, I could hear people cheering for me from down below.
‘Should I cry?’ I thought to myself. Surely, that would move the viewers. I grabbed tight onto the rung and, under the guise of wiping the sweat off my face, I poked myself in the eye. My eye began to bleed. Oh no. Did I poke myself too hard? Still, it was better than nothing. With a brave look on my face, I started to climb again. Thirty-six…thirty-seven…thirty-eight…thirty-nine…forty! I reached the house.
“Yay!” Everyone cheered for me from below. Byung-hoon and the Samaran man gave me congratulatory hugs.
The sight of me up in the tree house made the cast feel very proud. They gave victorious smiles, as if they were saying to the villagers, ‘See? Even a girl made it up there.’ Unfortunately, the Samaran villagers merely laughed. And then all of a sudden, a female villager stepped up and began to climb the ladder. She moved effortlessly, swaying her hips for all the men watching below. Everyone began to cheer her on.
“Look at that. Another girl crush,” I muttered to myself as I watched her. I’ve never seen a woman behave so fearlessly as her. Are all girls like that here? Anyways, with that, the Samaran villagers took home this victory, leaving Byung-hoon to be the loser. No wait, he wasn’t a loser. Just the fact that he came up here showed everyone how brave he was…but then I climbed up and then the Samaran woman climbed up, which lessened the achievement. Thankfully, he redeemed his lost glory during the warthog hunt, during which he did splendidly. And with that, he saved his image.
***
“This is good.”
Warthog meat. It’s really good. I’ve never had meat this good before, and there’s plenty of it to go around. We only caught one, but it was enough to feed us and the villagers.
“Sian, you’re amazing,” the lobster head producer said to me. From this angle, his face really does look pointed.
“What do you mean?”
“You know. When you climbed up the ladder earlier.”
“Anyone can do that,” I said with a casual shrug.
“You’re very modest.”
“Thank you,” I said with a bow. Then, I placed a bit of meat on top of his rice. He just looked so skinny and I felt bad for him. I’ve never met someone that looked so pitiful before. But there was something attractive about how smart he was. I really can’t tell what I think about this guy.
“Hey, Sian?” the lobster head producer said.
“Yes?” I said, this time sounding a little irritated. You don’t talk to someone when they’re eating, okay?
“I wanted to ask you a favor.”
“Yeah?”
“I might just be the new guy now, but I have a lot of potential.”
“So?”
Is he vying for a date or something?
“I don’t know when, but if I get to produce my own show, would you join me as a permanent cast member?”
Too bad it wasn’t him asking for a date. I had a great rejection all planned out. But join his show? As a permanent cast member?
“Are you casting it already?”
“Yeah. I would really like to do a show with you.”
“Really?”
Was he already staking claims on me? He probably thinks I’ll be in high demand later.
“Yes, I really want to.”
“What kind of show are you thinking?”
I should at least hear him out first.
“It’s called Two Nights…”
“I’m already hating it.”
Seriously, what kind of title is that? Two nights?
“But…you can eat as much as you want. And not just any type of food, all the food are specially prepared ones.”
Well, that certainly got my attention.
“Then, I’ll think about it,” I replied.
“Thanks. I’ll take that as a promise.”
Didn’t I just say I’ll think about it? I don’t remember promising him anything.
“Hang on. What about my appearance fee?”
“I’ll pay you three times as much.”
“Oh?”
Three times. But hmm…by the time he launches his show, won’t I be tons more popular than now? In that case, three times the fee sounds kind of little…
“You can say I’m trying to get the early bird discount.”
Well, at least he’s honest. That made me like the guy considerably more. So, I nodded.
“Alright then. Let’s do it.”
“Thanks. I feel like I won the lottery!”
“But don’t skimp on the meat.”
“Of course not. I’ll say this again. The food is Un. Li. Mi. Ted.”
He has no idea how much he’ll regret those words someday.
“Here’s the contract.”
He already had the contract prepared, and I signed it without a second thought. The thought of unlimited food was enough to make me happy, no matter how many times it ran through my head.
