Consultation Time.
Then again, it was far from a rest period. To prepare for the shooting range tomorrow, we were undergoing PRI Training, also known by its full name as Preliminary Rifle Instruction. For it, you lay down, get into a shooting position, and then your partner will put a pebble on top of the muzzle. After that, you pull the trigger. If the pebble stays on the muzzle, you pass. If not, you fail. It’s much harder than you’d think.
“This is heavy,” Heejin whined as she picked up a rifle.
“Let’s put a pillow underneath,” I suggested as I stuffed a pillow under her rifle. It seemed to help by a decent amount because Heejin gave me a satisfied smile.
“You need to get a better grip.”
With that, Heejin pressed the butt of the rifle onto her shoulder, then tilted her head to squint through the scale hole. I then placed a small pebble at the end of her rifle.
“Pull,” I said.
Heejin obediently pulled the trigger not long after.
Bang!
Thud.
The rifle flew backwards as the pebble fell off the rifle. It’s not like she has a hand tremor so why was she having such a hard time?
“You have to control your breathing, Heejin.”
“It’s hard.”
Well, this is true.
“Try to hold your breath right before you shoot.”
“Hmph.”
“Fine. Let’s stop,” I said, giving her a pat on the head. I mean, it’s not like she’s a real soldier, so what’s the point of having her do it well? Though I did hear that some people who are bad at the PRI are actually really good with the rifle as a whole.
“Now it’s your turn.”
“Okay.”
I got down, got into shooting position, and aimed my gun. Heejin then placed a small pebble on top of my rifle.
“Pull,” she said.
“Okay.”
I pulled the trigger.
Bang!
….
“Whoa, Sian! You did it again!”
“Pffft.”
Not even once did I make a mistake or fail. Heejin placed a pebble at the end of my rifle, one after the other, and I didn’t drop a single one. We remained as we were, practicing, when Joo-ran came up to me after a meeting with the bulldog instructor.
“Sian, she wants to see you.”
“Oh, okay.”
Was it my turn? What sort of meeting would it be? With those questions in mind, I got up and headed to the office where the instructor was waiting.
I arrived at the office, knocking before entering.
“Officer Lee, present, ma’am.”
“Hi, Sian. Please come in,” the bulldog instructor greeted me, gesturing towards the chair across from her. I sat on the chair indicated, looking at her over her desk.
“So, Officer Lee. How did training go?” she asked with a smile. Then again, it didn’t help her appearance at all. In fact, her smiling looked downright terrifying.
“It was fun,” I said.
Of course, I was only being polite. I had already decided that I’m never coming back here. To live a life that is heavily controlled and regulated? It really didn’t suit me. For the first time, I felt relieved that I was reborn in a woman’s body. In other words, that meant that I would never be required to enlist in such a place.
“Yeah, you looked like you were having fun. You were rather impressive, especially during the rope-climbing part.”
The bulldog instructor was looking at me with a mix of awe and disbelief. It was like she couldn’t believe the person sitting in front of her was an actual human being.
“I mean, anyone can do it if they put their minds to it,” I said modestly.
“You also have to be incredibly fearless,” the instructor added. Okay, I’ll give her that one. After all, it would take a brave soul to undo their safety harness and climb onto the rope. Even with the netting underneath, it’s still a scary ordeal to put oneself in.
“I guess so.”
“Your physicality is excellent as well.”
“Thank you.”
“I’m serious. Many soldiers would kill to have the level of skill you have.”
The instructor was just laying compliments on me and each one sounded more sincere than the last.
“I don’t know what to say,” I said, remaining humble.
“Which is why I wanted to see you, Officer Lee.”
“Yes, ma’am?”
“I wanted to ask…and I really hope you consider…would you consider joining the army?”
“No.”
I didn’t hesitate at all before I replied. No need to beat around the bush when I already knew my answer.
“Yeah…well, I figured. I’m sure being an idol is a lot more fun. But it’s truly a waste for someone like you to be a singer.”
“It’s a waste for someone with my face and figure to be a soldier.”
The instructor didn’t have an answer to that. I mean, it was true. A soldier couldn’t be too pretty or sexy. What kind of girl who was lucky enough to look like me would want to waste her time being a soldier? Of course, everyone is different, but I’m sure that there are very few exceptions. And I am very sure that I am most certainly not one of them. I had no intention of becoming a soldier, not now or ever.
“You’re right. Still, it’s a shame for someone of your skill level. You could be one of the best female agents in the Secret Special Forces. You could even join our elite Black Widow Force while you’re at it. I really hope you reconsider it. The world isn’t as safe as it used to be. We could really use an agent like you.”
So it was already a position for an agent, huh? Well, too bad for her. I was not going to reconsider.
“I’m sorry, but I really have no intention of joining the army.”
“Sigh…” The instructor gave a disappointed sigh. She must have really wanted to persuade me.
“I understand. If you change your mind at all, come see me anytime, okay? I’ll be waiting.”
“No need for that.”
“Fine.”
“Oh, but…ma’am?”
“Yes?”
“May I know when the officers will be out on break?”
“What? Why?” the instructor asked me, looking a bit confused.
“I wanted to know so I can take them out for a meal,” I said with an innocent smile.
“Oh, really? I mean, of course. I’m sure they will like that. Hang on.”
The instructor brought over her calendar and showed me all of their vacation dates. I made sure to memorize the dates of the tanned instructor, the referee officer, and the gas chamber officer.
“Thank you, ma’am.”
“Okay. And please, do give my words some thought, okay?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“You are dismissed. Now please bring Heejin in here.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
And with a final bow, I left. s I did, a smirk crept up on my face.
“You guys are dead.”
I could feel my smile becoming more and more nefarious.
***
After everyone finished their consultations, we finished our evening roll call, and got ready for bed. It was finally the last evening of this suffering hellhole life of a soldier. Is this how men feel on the last night of their enlistment? No, I’m sure they’re happier than this. After all, they have to suffer this life for up to two whole years.
“Everyone in Unit 3 will now retire to bed. Our final evening in the military. I hope everyone has a good night,” Heejin said.
We all congratulated each other.
“Sian, good job,” Heejin said as she burrowed herself under her sheets.
“You too, Heejin.”
“Sian, you were really cool.”
Heejin’s compliment made me smile. There was no point in denying it. Once the show airs, I was going to become a bigger hit than before. At this rate, I was well on my way to becoming a top star.
“Hey, Heejin.”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t fart, okay?”
“Okay! I even went to the bathroom earlier.”
“That’s good,” I said with a satisfied nod. It’s good that she did that. Speaking of which, I also went to the bathroom earlier, so the fact that I ate eight hard-boiled eggs didn’t matter in the end. I’ll be able to get a good night’s sleep tonight.
“But how can a girl as cute as you fart so much?”
“Irritable Bowel Syndrome…hehe…” Heejin giggled.
And at that evening, Heejin’s farts once again made history as the worst, most toxic odor.
***
When I came out, Hyuk-ae was waiting for me in the van. The other members of Lovely Girlz had come out.
“Bye, Sian! Call me, okay? Promise?”
“Okay,” I said, giving Heejin my number.
“Thanks, Sian!” Heejin said, giving me one final hug. After she left, I went to join my own group. They were very happy to see me.
“Sian!”
“Oh my god, Sian!”
Everyone ran towards me and engulfed me into a big group hug. God, what would I do without these girls? Especially Jia. I almost kissed her when I saw her beautiful face.
“Good job, Sian,” someone said as they climbed out of the van.
That someone was Jinwoo. Look at him coming out to see me. Did that mean we were going out to celebrate? I’m sorry, but when I see Jinwoo, all I can think about is how much food he’s gonna buy me.
“Hi, Mr. Park. It’s good to see you again.”
“Glad to see you lived, Sian. How was it?”
“I’m just really hungry.”
“O-oh…r-really?”
The color drained from Jinwoo’s face in an instant. That always happens when I tell him I’m hungry.
“Mr. Park! Now that Sian is out, let’s go out to eat and celebrate!” Hainan squealed. Jinwoo suddenly looked like a doting father as he agreed. No way could he say no to Hainan.
“Okay! Let’s go! What do you want to eat, Hainan?”
Um, hello? Last time I checked, I was the one who suffered these past few days. Not Hainan.
“Lobster,” I cut in. Everyone immediately piped in to agree.
Unfortunately, in the end, we couldn’t have lobster. We came to a famous Chinese restaurant in Gangnam instead. They didn’t have lobster, but they had sweet and sour pork, dumplings, black noodles and spicy seafood noodles, and so on. I ordered one of everything and eagerly dug in.
“Wow…this is good…Hey Jia, what are you doing?”
While I was busy stuffing my mouth with food, Jia was texting away on her phone. What could be so important?
“I’m texting the guy I’m dating.”
“What? Dating?!”
My stomach began to twist and turn into knots. Dating? While I was in the military, Jia began to date someone? This is exactly why I shouldn’t have left in the first place.
“Who is it?” I demanded.
