Uncle Fireball was surrounded by the three of us in his own living room. He was forced to open the package in front of us, but he didn’t show any signs of weakness.
Instead, his expression was a mix of pride and disdain.
He casually handed the package to me and said, “If you’re interested in the contents, then open it yourself.”
Huh, why is he so confident? Maybe it’s not lubricant and an enema device inside, but a package bomb or something that would explode when I open it?
I also heard about cases where fellow online store owners would mail poop to buyers who gave them bad reviews.
So in order to avoid the contents if it was a bomb or poop, I handed to package to Fan Chuan and said:
“You open it. The sooner you determine what’s inside, the sooner you can decide whether you need to have a real life PK with Uncle Fireball.”
Fan Chuan fiercely glared at Uncle Fireball, then without the use of scissors or a knife, he directly tore open the package with his hands.
“Don’t break it.” Uncle Fireball reminded him.
“What, are you still planning to use what’s inside here?” Fan Chuan made a disgusted expression, “How can Xiao Hong have such a perverted uncle like you.”
But Fan Chuan froze after he opened the box, and Xiao Ding also froze when he saw what was inside.
Hey, don’t block me, let me also look at what’s inside. Don’t tell me it’s a ticking time bomb? Or maybe a time bomb with a pile of poop on top, so as long as it explodes, it will scatter everything into the sky, so that no one can avoid it.
Damn, the seller is ruthless, how many bad reviews did Uncle Fireball give you?
I Stretched out my neck to look over, but found the item lying in the box, was an Apple iPad. The simple white outer packaging made it easy so that people know at a glance what was inside.
“Um… although it’s an Apple box, could it have something else inside?” Xiao Ding offered his opinion.
“Then why don’t you just open the box as well.” Uncle Fireball grunted, “But this is a gift to my nephew, if you break it, you have to pay for it.”
I picked up the iPad box, weighed it in my hands, and made a judgment.
“There’s nothing else inside, it should just be the tablet. The weight doesn’t feel like lubricant and other tools…”
Uncle Fireball snorted and said mockingly: “Ye Lin, you’re quite the professional at selling adult products, you can simply use your hands to weigh if it contains adult products or not.”
No one is professional to that extent. I just used the iPad that Ai Mi casually leaves around in her RV, so I’m familiar with its weight.
“You pervert, why are you buying an iPad for Xiao Hong.” Fan Chuan was puzzled and still looked cross-eyed at Uncle Fireball.
“Does someone who thinks about marrying a trap every day have any right to call me a pervert?” Uncle Fireball asked a rhetorical question, “I have not seen my nephew for two years, so what’s wrong with buying him a gift? After spending these days together, I found out Shu Zhe likes Apple’s products…”
*Creak*, the bedroom door opened from the inside. Shu Zhe still didn’t have time to change out of the maid’s outfit, he only took off the cat ears and changed his underwear, and he walked out while wiping his tears.
“What, so uncle wasn’t trying to…”
Shu Zhe, who still had the outward appearance of a delicate girl, made Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding’s heart tremble at a glance. Even their expressions unconsciously softened up.
Although Uncle Fireball was used to seeing his nephew’s appearance these days, Shu Zhe seemed to be more feminine in front of Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding, his two suitors, so Uncle Fireball did not know where to look, so he looked away and said:
“At first, I really was quite angry with you, but when I thought about it, I can’t blame everything on you. I’ve made you suffer in the past few days, so I’m giving you this tablet as an apology… don’t tell your sister and your parents.”
So you’re going to bribe him with a gift. Uncle Fireball, are you also learning from the Americans and using the carrot and stick method?
Shu Zhe saw his uncle’s gift was still in my hand, so he couldn’t wait anymore and basically snatched it out of my hands.
After tearing off the plastic film, opening the outer packaging and seeing the milky white body lying in the box, Shu Zhe pouted, “How come it’s only the 3rd gen, the latest one is already the 4th gen.”
I think you should be content, even the third gen costs around ¥2,500! I was already pretty happy when my dad bought me a ¥300 MP4 as a birthday gift.
“Anyway, you can use it first.” Uncle Fireball was a little embarrassed and scratched the back of his head, “It seemed like you wanted an iPhone 5s, but your phone is still very new, so I first bought you an iPad to play with, then once you break your current phone…”
Shu Zhe’s eyes flashed with surprise, as if he suddenly realized that his uncle had retired home and received a significant amount of disability pension, and had the ability to buy him many gifts.
He turned around to look at his phone, which he had bought less than three months ago, sitting next to the bottle of Wuliangye liquor on the dining room table. He ignored the fact that he was wearing a skirt, took a couple steps and put the phone into his hands, then pretended it slipped naturally from his grasp, hoping it would fall to pieces once it hit the hard tile floor.
Where is your integrity? That’s the new phone your sister bought for you after 28 Middle students were allowed to carry cell phones, while she’s using your old phone!
Fortunately, I was prepared, when Shu Zhe went to the table to get the phone, I followed him, and was able to catch the falling phone in my hand, so it didn’t break.
Hm, gramp Ren’s Yin Yang Sanshou can be used to catch a falling person. Although I had heart problems, catching a cell phone was not a problem.
“Bro Ye Lin, you…” Shu Zhe was actually angry at me after I ruined his plan.
Huh, are you fearless now because Fan Chuan, Xiao Ding, and your uncle all likes you? Do you think they would back you up, so you have the guts to glare at me?
I couldn’t encourage his arrogance, so I was going to give Shu Zhe a smack on his head. He immediately closed his eyes tightly, making a similar appearance to Gong CaiCai when I flicked her head, a lovable but nervous look.
Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding immediately shielded Shu Zhe like they were his summoned familiars.
“What are you going to do to Xiao Hong? How can you lay your hands on someone so cute.”
“Xiao Ye, you… you can’t hit Xiao Hong! She didn’t mean to drop her phone…”
Who said she didn’t mean it? I don’t care if Fan Chuan was dead set on protecting Xiao Hong, but Xiao Ding too? You’re always in contact with the class leader at the pet hospital, but how did you fall for the class leader’s brother instead of the class leader?
Shu Zhe hid behind Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding, then made a face at me when no one else was watching.
How ungrateful, I should have never come to rescue you, I should have let Uncle Fireball pop your cherry.
Wait, it seems that Uncle Fireball did not intend to do anything to Shu Zhe as evidenced by the delivery.
But even if he’s not doing anything today, it does not mean he wouldn’t do anything later. It looked like there was a trace of jealousy in Uncle Fireball’s eyes as he watching Shu Zhe wearing women’s clothing and taking cover behind Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding as Xiao Hong.
While Shu Zhe was looking over his new iPad, and Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding were fawning over him, I pulled Uncle Fireball to the side and asked him quietly:
“What are you trying to achieve by buying a gift for Shu Zhe? Is it because you want to work at Shu Zhe little by little and let the gold-digging him have ‘compensated dating’ with you?”
“Who would want to have compensated dating with their own nephew?” Uncle Fireball gasped, “I simply wanted to give some gifts to the younger generation.”
“Bullshit.” I frowned, “You and Shu Sha haven’t seen each other for a long time either, so why are you only giving gifts to your nephew but not your niece?”
In addition to suspecting that Uncle Fireball’s motives are impure, I also cried out about the unfairness for the class leader.
“I never said I wasn’t going to give Sha Sha a gift.” Uncle Fireball bemoaned, “I know that Sha Sha is not a big fan of electronics, so I intended on sending her a few pairs of upscale women’s shoes.”
As a girl, the number of shoes the class leader has is indeed too small. If Uncle Fireball wants to buy shoes for the class leader, it would be put to good use.
“Wait.” I asked again, “Don’t tell me you want to personally accompany Shu Sha to the mall to buy shoes, then peek at her feet while she tries on shoes, you lolicon.”
“Who would plan that?!” Uncle Fireball was furious, “I’m not that perverted, but it seems you’re interested in my niece’s feet, you foot loving freak.”
I was left speechless because I felt guilty. The other day at the Cui Song Mountain Hotel, I did use the class leader’s bare feet for nefarious purposes.
“I will ask my wife to accompany her.” Uncle Fireball said with conviction, “I know I’m a bit of a lolicon, so I won’t give myself too many opportunities to be alone with Sha Sha. I will also instruct my wife to buy some shoes with higher heels, and prettier…”
“Hey, Shu Sha is already very tall, so why specifically choose shoes with high heels, what are you planning?”
“Um…” now it was Uncle Fireball’s turn to have a guilty conscience, “I was thinking she wouldn’t be able to run as fast if she wears high heels…”
“Damn, you pervert, you still have your mind set on Shu Sha, right? Do you think it will be easier for you to catch up and pounce on her if she wears those kinds of shoes?”
“Ye Lin, shut up. I only hold an uncle to niece, or elder to junior, or hunter to little hunter’s love for Sha Sha.” Uncle Fireball lectured me, then licked his dry lips:.
“I hope Sha Sha wears shoes that aren’t so suitable for running, because… just in case I lose control of myself one day and forced myself on Shu Zhe, I wouldn’t be caught by my niece so easily to be finished off… “
And you called me a pervert, so in the end, you still wanted to forced yourself on Shu Zhe! Are you buying him gifts now because you hope that one day he would voluntarily let you push him down?
I can’t take it anymore. Currently, there are a total of 5 men in this room, but Shu Zhe does not have an outward appearance of a man at all. For the 3 men other than me, everyone is thinking of forcing themselves on Shu Zhe!
I already gave up hope for this world where everyone wants to force themselves on a trap!
