The more Wu Yijun listened, the more her agitated emotions such as nervousness and anxiety seemed to calm down. However, this by no means meant that she was as calm and placid as her outward face suggested since if Bai Zemin were to look into her eyes closely he would easily discover a flame of anger burning in those two pretty dark eyes of hers.
That's right, the usually calm and generally kind Wu Yijun was angry.
No, to say she was angry was an understatement…. She was furious!
When she found out that at some point in Bai Zemin's adolescence there was a girl who was vicious enough to play with his heart, for the first time in her life she wanted to grab a woman by the hair and roll her all over the ground until she shined the floor tiles!
After Bai Zemin stopped talking, she secretly gritted her teeth and said in a low voice:
"How can that girl be so heartless?"
Bai Zemin didn't know whether to laugh or cry as he looked at her out of the corner of his eye. Although the voice of the girl beside him was low and soft, it was impossible not to notice the anger boiling under the seemingly stable surface.
"You don't need to overthink it. While I won't deny that it was an important part of my past, it's no longer important to me now. The reason I told you this is because I needed to get here so that you would understand the real reason why I may not be able to reciprocate your feelings."
Wu Yijun's face instantly turned pale when she heard this. The river of lava that seemed to flow through her veins and filled her with anger and heat suddenly seemed to freeze and turn into a huge glacier that froze her blood completely and even made it difficult for her to breathe.
"W- Why…?" She asked with latent fear.
Bai Zemin sighed in his heart seeing her like this.
Regardless of what the reason might be, rejection was rejection no matter how nice one made it look or sound. When the love one felt was not reciprocated, one was bound to suffer and cry; that was life after all. But this was especially the case for a girl like Wu Yijun, a girl who in over twenty years was just experiencing the first love of her life.
Even if Bai Zemin was not rejecting her outright, his words basically suggested it from a certain point of view. At least, that was how Wu Yijun herself felt and it made her little heart tighten.
Bai Zemin had no way of knowing, but the truth was that the pain Wu Yijun felt at that moment was even greater than the pain she felt several minutes earlier when he tried to share part of his records with her briefly. The pain she felt came from deep within her existence, difficult to describe, a pain that robbed her of sleep and the will to live.
"Because my Magic stat and my Mana stat were more than ten times higher than what a normal existence should have at the beginning of the evolution, the Soul Record seemed to give me some importance above the rest…. At least that's what I think." Bai Zemin explained slowly as he stared at the slowly darkening sky outside the window.
"My experience in love, as I just told you before, was not good at all, and my broken heart somehow fomented for the most part my careful and distrustful personality towards people. This was especially so with women…. Then, when the Soul Record turned my past into records imprinted on my soul, that particular record was apparently aggravated or given more attention than usual. As a result, approximately twenty-four hours after the Soul Record arrived on Earth, a passive skill automatically awakened in me."
"A skill?" Wu Yijun asked with some difficulty, forcing herself to calm down. Somehow, it seemed that the really important thing was yet to come.
"Em. A skill." Bai Zemin nodded and turned his face to look her in the eyes as he slowly said, "The name of this skill is Stone Heart… and it is a Third Order passive skill."
Lilith aside, this was the first time Bai Zemin told another person or living being about the existence of the skill Stone Heart. Although one of his greatest secrets was coming out, he was 90% sure that Wu Yijun would never use it against him. Besides, he somehow believed that she deserved to know the truth; a good-hearted girl should not have to go through something as bad as what he went through years ago.
Wu Yijun's eyes trembled and her pupils constricted slightly when she heard the name of the skill. At the same time, her heart tightened a little when she learned that this skill even had such a high level.
Third Order! This was by far the highest level skill Wu Yijun had ever known and would most likely stay that way for quite a while longer!
" Stone Heart…?" She muttered unconsciously as she stared at him.
" Stone Heart." Bai Zemin nodded and said in a clear voice, "Just as the name of the skill suggests, the function of the Stone Heart skill is to protect my heart from suffering disappointment in the future by expecting something from others. Specifically, this skill makes it extremely difficult for people other than those close to me to move my emotions or touch my heart."
"… Now I understand… Now I understand how a normal student went from being a citizen to someone capable of keeping his sanity and unblinkingly slaughtering so many people." Wu Yijun felt as if a great veil of mystery that was always there was slowly becoming clearer.
Bai Zemin nodded, " That's right. I don't know how many higher Orders there are after Stone Heart evolves, but a Third Order skill is definitely powerful…. and especially a passive one. Even though I had never killed anyone before, the first time I did it I felt no joy or sadness, my heart didn't move at all and it was no different than breathing."
"That skill…. It's too dangerous!" Wu Yijun looked at him worriedly and pointed out, "Sure, now it helps you keep a level head in front of people and helps you make mostly rational decisions, but that can also cause you to be alone for the whole eternity!"
"That's one of the problems." Bai Zemin nodded with a faint smile of helplessness. "The skill Stone Heart not only prevents those foreign to me from having a lot of difficulties and making it nearly impossible for them to break into my heart, but this effect is doubled against the opposite sex. In return, my affection for those I love is greatly magnified."
"You…"
Wu Yijun's expression became incredibly sad as she looked into his eyes. To her, that helpless smile hid a great weight and sadness that no one could understand.
She was not sad because she had just learned that her beloved had a skill that basically made it impossible for any woman to ever win a place in his heart no matter how small, the reason behind her sadness was that the man she loved so much was suffering.
If Bai Zemin's affection and attachment increased as a consequence of the skill Stone Heart, then Wu Yijun could not even imagine how much affection he felt for his family at this moment. Only now did she understand the reason why he had told her earlier that every single step he took since day 1 of the apocalypse had been focused on helping his loved ones.
He loved them so much, he loved them more than with all his heart. However, because he didn't have the ability to cross an entire district by himself, in the end, he had no choice but to grit his teeth and hold on. But how much pain was he feeling? How heavy was his heart as he went to bed every night and thought about whether his loved ones were alive or not? How guilty would he feel as he enjoyed sumptuous meals every day while wondering if his loved ones were eating well?
"I'm sorry…. I had no idea about anything." She apologized and shook her head vigorously as she barely managed to hold back the urge to cry.
"It's okay." Bai Zemin shook his head without saying much more about it.
To be honest with himself, while he didn't appreciate others feeling sympathy for him, he also couldn't deny that it felt a little good to know that there was finally someone who understood one thing; that he was human, that he also suffered, and that he also needed understanding. So far, all he had done had been to advance without being defeated even once, which made everyone unconsciously look at him as if he were a divinity among mortals. But they were all wrong.
Wu Yijun had realized precisely that. That's why she apologized. Because at the end of the day, she also ended up unwittingly believing that Bai Zemin was an almighty all-powerful existence; because that was how it had been until now.
"So, I think you now understand the reason why I told you what I said before." He looked at her seriously and said plainly, "I don't want to give you false hope for anything, because I know how cruel it would be to do that. Therefore, I think it will be better for you if you make an effort to kill those feelings as soon as possible. I know it will hurt a lot, but I firmly believe that it is better to feel a lot of pain for a few weeks, months, or a few years… and not feel pain every day for the rest of your life."
Bai Zemin was remarkably honest and hid almost nothing. He knew how painful it was to have one's emotions played with when one was in love, so he was not willing to become a piece of scum like those who taunted him and whom he once repudiated.
The only thing he did not tell Wu Yijun was that in case anyone ever managed to conquer his love, there was a woman who at the moment had the absolute leadership of that position and hardly a contender would be born.
Of course, all this was as long as the skill Stone Heart continued to be Stone Heart after evolving to the next stage if at some point Bai Zemin managed to fulfill all the evolution requirements… Because if the skill Stone Heart changed completely, then things could be very different from what he thought right now.
But, the problem was… Did Wu Yijun think the same as him?
"That's for me to decide, not you."
She said out of nowhere and when Bai Zemin looked at her he met her face filled with stubbornness as she stared at him.
"Whether or not it is impossible to carve out a place in your heart. That is yet to be seen. I firmly believe that it is only impossible if you believe that it is…. Even stones will crack eventually. " She got up from the bed and walked towards the door, leaving Bai Zemin speechless.
Just before she opened the door, she said without looking back, "If it were someone else, I would certainly advise her to give up to avoid suffering…. But you know what? I, Wu Yijun, was always a woman who gives good advice to others but rarely follows it. You, Bai Zemin, are the man I want to spend my whole life with… and as hard as it may be, I will fight for it no matter what."
"Did you not hear everything I just said?" Bai Zemin looked at her back and frowned slightly angrily as he said, "Are you crazy?"
"Maybe I am." She replied and opened the door, "But, in a world of crazies like this, being sane is craziness."
Bang!
The door was slammed shut as if the person who had just left had struck an imaginary hammer similar to a dictatorial judge in a courtroom who had reached her irrevocable decision.
Bai Zemin looked at the closed wooden door, dumbfounded. His mouth opened and closed several times as if he wanted to say something but not even a sound came out.
In a world of crazies like this, being sane is craziness…
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Thank you very much to everyone who voted for Blood Warlock with Golden Tickets! <3
