“Yan Su, you can keep it secret now, but you can’t keep it secret forever. The press is too intrusive,” Xiang Wan said earnestly. “If you have a child on your own before you’ve graduated from college, people will talk. They might see you as a slut.”
“But, I’m a singer, not an actress,” Yan Su gathered the courage and said, “Watching TV and listening to songs are different. All I need to do is to focus on my music. People can say whatever they want about me, but as long as my music is good, they’ll still listen to it. I know I can make this work.”
“You are too naive,” Xiang Wan said frustratedly, “To be honest, I don’t think you know what you’re doing. Why are you having the child on your own? Where is the father? You think you’re giving it a life? You’re wrong. When the child is old enough to learn that it doesn’t have a father, that it was born out of wedlock…do you think it’ll be happy? And do you want to get married? Will the man you love accept the fact that you’ve already had a baby? Won’t he mind? Well, he might be okay with it, but what about his family? Will they accept you?”
Yan Su, on hearing those words turned pale. Tremblingly, she said, “I don’t plan to get married. I might never get married. That’s why I want this baby. No, I can’t give my baby a father. But, it was destiny that brought the baby to me. My friend just had a baby. He’s so little and so adorable. I can’t kill my baby. I can’t.”
She had given up on love. Her first relationship turned out to be a nightmare, and her second one ended really badly, too.
She didn’t know if she was the one with the problem—or if she had awful taste in men. Maybe she wasn’t meant to be a good girlfriend. She wouldn’t have another boyfriend, she believed.
Seriously, it all started beautifully and sweetly but ended in such a harmful way. “You say that, because you’re young,” Xiang Wan shook her head. She completely disagreed with that. “I’m not much older than you are, but I’ve been through more than you have. When I was a student, I too felt that love could be my whole world. Well, when you graduate and take your place in society, you’ll realize how silly you were to have those thoughts because of just one relationship. When you turn 30, you’ll feel lonely at night. You’ll want a family.”
“That’s why I’ve decided to have this baby,” Yan Su raised her head and said, “Miss. Xiang, I might be childish in your eyes. But people always make mistakes when they’re young. If this turns out to be a mistake, I’ll suffer the consequences. I’ve thought about it. I’m two months pregnant now, and I can work until the fourth or even fifth month. I’m thin, so I think it won’t be so obvious. If you can’t accept it, I’ll have no choice but to end our contract. I’m willing to pay the penalty.”
Xiao Wan knitted her brows into a deep frown and spent a long while looking at Yan Su in the eyes, then said, “The company is going to have a concert tour for you this year. This is your best time. Your popularity will decline if you disappeared now. We don’t know how many people will still be willing to buy tickets to your concerts when you came back. If you have to have this baby, I don’t want your money. I want you to give me two new songs in the next two months, no matter how busy you are. The company will release the songs while you’re having the baby. We’ll tell people you’ve gone abroad to study music. But you need to come back after you’ve recovered from childbirth.”
“Thank you,” Yan Su stood up, bowed deeply.
“Also, where do you plan to have the baby?” Xiang Wan asked.
Yan Su hesitated a moment before saying, “I want to go back to my parents. It would be really awkward for a pregnant woman to go abroad alone.”
…
